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Recap. SS is extremely disrespectful to SO and BM had added on. I ended up being away for 5 days. I needed it , but I do like to be in my own space with all my fur babies and not at someone else's house. SO told BM he is not taking SS to anything but actual games and it will only be half of them, she has to do her share. No more private practices. He told her he is not going to give anything for SS driving because SS is too immature. He will not pay or drive SS to basketball if he decides to stay on the team.
So I made two previous posts on here about a situation I was dealing with where my SO's 15 year old son moved in with us and started becoming aggresive with our cat and I had to take her to my mom's house. Shortly after that I made a decision to move in with my mom for the time being for multiple reasons including issues within our relationship, our apartment being too small for the 3 of us and financially. My goal was for us to work on ourselves and for me to get my debt paid off and work on my credit and he could focus on his son. We are still together and still love each other.
I don't want to add details here right now, but suffice it to say that I am concerned our marriage may not last much longer. He's currently away for the month, including him spending time with his family (this is a long story in itself), and some things have come to light so now I'm fully aware of, at least mostly, his situation.
I have a list of things to discuss with him when he returns and if he doesn't want to talk about it, stalls or doesn't answer truthfully, and refuses to get a marriage counselor I think we are done.
I did not expect it to go this way at all.
I am new here and hopefully I've found the right outlet to allow me to vent from time to time and to gain some insight and guidance from those who have been there.
I've no kids of my own and marrying into my new Family with two stepchildren. A 16-year-old boy who has his own vehicle and comes over when he wants which is nice and a six-year-old girl that we have 50% of the time. Both are great kids, smart, loving and kind.
There are some frustrations and issues related to the six-year-old and how coddled and spoiled she is, but I'll save that topic for another day.
I wanted to take a moment to send out blessings to all on here who are suffering = and say thank you for all who commented and/or sent me digital hugs regarding my poochie's passing.
It was a rough week, I tell you, but it has ended in a warm sunshine embrace and Im headed out to the beach!
Looking back in Hindsight about lots of things, especially StepLife, it shouldnt be so surprising how some things actually start to make sense and the pieces come together. This being one of them: Once you realize that these toxic SKIDS ( BM.s etc) dont have any REAL problems with you. They just want some Attention! Thats why they still manage to have some kind of reason to be upset with you even though you havent done anythning to them or barely speak to them.
So SS20 will be 21 in two weeks. Now.. SS20 and I do not speak. I'm so over him and I just think he is fake like his BM. I haven't spoken to him in months and leave the room when he enters it. He has treated me like garbage basically from the start (he was 12 when I met him) and his attitude towards me has not changed well into adulthood. We've had some major blowouts this year and I am just done. SO naturally still makes excuses for him but whatever.
BM emailed DH yesterday to update him on their summer travel plans. She said they aren't going to the Europe anymore, made no mention of going to Florida (which SS said they only wanted to do because we took SS there last month), etc. She said at this point, their only plans this summer are camping for 2 days in a bordering state. She mentioned that they may also go to Canada for a day trip (which she has been promising SS for 5 years and they've never been despite us living an hour from the border).
Has anyone reached the point in which you find that just about every little thing having to do with the SKIDS just instantly irritates you? Am I being that irrational? Especially over something as trivial as getting a phone call from SD29 to my MIL during our 4th of July gathering with her, DH and my parents who have gotten along famously with my inlaws.
We hadnt gotten together like this in months and finally got it organized. Damn well we deserve to enjoy ourselves for so much as ONE day ( which we did once she left us alone) without SD having to make something about her
that is MA's mantra of late. Cool...I can see his is trying to be different since his extra-curricular activies were discovered. What MA fails to realize..I am ALSO a different person. After finding his years and years long extra-curriculars changed me...along with therapy for complex PTSD.
MA does not like the new me all that much at times....I no longer sweep his crappy behavior under the rug. I won't light myself on fire to make him happy anymore and I no longer blindly trust him. Trust but verify buddy...that is where we are at.
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