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NotYourAverageStepMama's Blog

Fake family members and BM

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I have mentioned on here before that DH's family is a mess and the only immediate family member he talks to is his dad. DH has 3 half siblings, the one we do actually like is unfortunately in and out of jail. DH's sister is the type of person who wants to know the gossip about everyone then spread it around and she also only does things for people if she thinks she will get something out of it, so we only talk to her in relation to DH's dad's health when we have to. DH's other sibling I have mentioned before on my old account futurestepmomnowstepgf.

Place Your Bets, Do you think BM will let us see SD before we move

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So as most of you should know we are about 3 weeks away from our move date of moving from the East Coast to the West Coast. When the CO was made, BM was supposedly moving the summer of 2020, she did not, but we have abided by the out of state schedule since September 2020 as we were moving May 2021 and BM is high conflict. We are not supposed to see SD again until our summer visitation which begins the end of June. We have been thinking about asking BM if we can see SD for an afternoon/evening prior to us moving to take her out somewhere before we go.

Steplife topic - Out of state visitation - plane tickets

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Okay so on to an actual steplife topic. For those of you who have or have had out of state visitation with their skids, how soon or how late do you notify BM or the bio parent of the travel information. On Wednesday we sent out our change of address notice to BM so it went out 5 weeks and a few days before our lease starts. Now we sent BM the dates for summer we selected prior to April 1 also as is outlined in the CO. What is not outlined in the CO is when we have to notify BM of the exact travel plans for SD.

O/T - Problem with pet walker, are we being dramatic?

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Okay so this is totally off topic, but the way the pet service is handling this makes us wonder if we are being dramatic. To make a long story short, for the last year we have been using a pet service that comes 3 times a day to walk our dog, fill the dog and cat bowls, clean the cat litter box, play with the pets, etc. it is a 20 minute visit each time. For the past 2 years before this DH's co-worker would come and take care of our pets. So since we started using this new service we have had the same lady each time and we use her 1-2 times almost every month.

O/T: Cousin is getting married - A vent

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So on my old account, futurestepmomnowstepgf, I had vented about my cousin and his girlfriend who are my age. When I vented about them before it was because they had been sick with COVID, just got done their quarantining period and were coming up for a family gathering. I was not very fond of my cousin’s girlfriend after day 2 of meeting her almost 2 years ago now and my dislike has only gotten stronger. My cousin and I growing up were very close, we have always lived states away, but we were close until also about 2 years ago.

Move Update

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So today we are 5 weeks exactly until we leave from the East Coast to the West Coast. Two days ago we reserved a pet friendly air bnb in Montana for two days so we can go see Yellowstone National Park on our journey. That is our big thing to see on our way and everything else will be little pit stops besides sleeping in a hotel somewhere for the night. The pets have been to the vet, got updated on shots, got the medicine for the cat, and some advice for the journey.

Summer visitation

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So yesterday morning DH sent BM a message in the court approved app, notifying her of the dates for summer we have selected before our April 1 deadline that allows BM to chose if we do not notify her before then. BM read the message and did not respond. Should we ask her to confirm she received it? Big part of me thinks it is totally unnecessary, but just two months ago BM had a huge fit about summer dates and thought she had a say in the dates, which she does not.

I was right SM DOES have COVID and exposed her SD

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For those of you who saw my blog post last week, I had said I was suspicious that my SM friend had COVID and just did not want to tell me. SM called me on Friday evening and told me that she does have COVID and just wasn't really telling anyone, but even though her 10 days of quarantining aren't up until this Tuesday that the doctor told her if she wasn't feeling symptoms then she was fine to see people. Um WHAT?!... SM goes on to tell me how that evening (Friday) her DH was going to pick up SD and bring her back to their home for spring break.

Maybe COVID and the SM I know

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For those of you who don't already know this is futurestepmomnowstepgf's new profile. Anyway, I have posted about my SM friend quite a few times. So we have SD for spring break until this Sunday at 5 pm and it has been up in the air on if SM and her DH are getting SD for her spring break. Make a long story short, they were supposed to get SD for President's Day weekend, but BM was like no, you can have her for her spring break. SD's dad agreed to the change.

Looking back

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This is futurestepmomnowstepgf's new profile since that username is no longer applicable to me. Since we have had SD for spring break, I have been able to see how far my DH has come on being parent versus when I first met him. I never really posted venting about DH's parenting because unlike many users on here when I have discussed parenting with DH, he responded positively and if a change needs to be made, he actually made it.