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Recent Blog Posts
I just joined this site in the hope to get some advice. I respect not everyone will have the same opinion usually due to their own personal circumstances.
A while back, I had posted asking about self-help books or techniques. I've been blogging a little bit about my journey in individual counelling, DH's individual counselling and marital counselling since the beginning of 2021. It's totally changed my life and marriage except there's one lingering major, very long-standing pattern that I can't seem to figure out.
I am finally recovering from Covid. This is the first time I've ever had it, and it sucks. Thanks work "bro" for coughing into my desk fan days before Thanksgiving! I hope you get herpes for Christmas!
I was looking for our court order in DH and my joint email account today to look for a clarification to an upcoming visitation. The clarification I needed wasn't in the most recent CO, so I started looking for the old COs in our email. While we keep physical copies of all our COs and court documents, it is less stressful to keyword search for the document we need instead of sifting through thousands of pages of printed documents. While looking for said court orders, I ended up coming across packets of emails between BM and DH that we had sent our attorney for our court battle 3 years ago.
So, we found out this week that satan is letting her spawn go on unchaperoned dates with an older teen girl during her twice a month visitation.
These dates include movies and joy riding and generally hanging out in vehicles. I found notes between SS and his girlfriend where they discuss "kissing, hugging, and you know what" and how his girlfriend can't wait to have his babies.
DH and I think he is to young to date and definetly to young to go places unsupervised - he doesn't have the best track history of making good decisions.
So..as I was walking through what SS will need to do tomorrow, we happened to touch on a few more other things, including his long shower without soap (see other post for this. What bothers me was the water waste, but per SS15 he thinks not knowing how to shower correctly is something embarrassing and would rather us not to talk to his therapist about it).
Out of all of the topic, SS made a snarky and creepy comment:
SS: So...I have a question for you
SS: So...what was the thumping noise in your room the other day?
So this is one of my many difficult scenarios I need help with! I am the "Stepmom".......
Boy comes home from basketball tryouts, previously knowing he would not make the team due to an injury.
Dad says, “So, how did it go?”
Boy says, “Shut the fuck up” as he walks upstairs.
Stepmom says, “Oh my God……” not yelling but in disgust because of the disrespect he gave his father.
Boy tells Stepmom, “Fuck you”.
Dad says to Stepmom, “Ya had to piss him off didn’t you! I told you he would probably come home upset. You are so rude!”
Just thought I would hop on to share the straw that broke the SMS back and allowed me to completely check out from step hell and the last of the Skids.
For reference I have been married 11 years. Three SSs ranging from 25 to 16. The only one that we see or hear from is the youngest. I have had an ok relationship with him but we aren't buddys. He will say love you when I have to take him places but other then that we don't really speak much.
And I think we were both ok with that. No one taking it personally.
So we have a snow day today, my wife and I are both teachers The kids come in (very loudly) after being dropped off by their dad. SS8 comes in and tells us the plan for the day. He is going to watch tv for a while and then we are taking them sledding. SD12 comes in and informs us she won't be shovelling because she just did at her dads. I guess this is fair but no one asked her to shovel in the first place. SS8 also informs us that he won't be shovelling even though he did nothing at his dads. He then wants bacon and pancakes for breakfast. I just feel like they are so entitled and
SS15 did not acknowledge DH's birthday. I'm disengaged so I said nothing- but I can't help but wonder what DH thinks about this...
At what age do kids get their parents gifts? He has an allowance so he has the means to get him a small gift- hell even make him a card... something!! I know he didn't get him a gift- and IDK if he even wished him a happy bday? I get teens are self centered but this just seems over the top to me...