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Recent Blog Posts
SD26 is still lingering in our area like a bad smell. She is not coming to our house because she's mad that the last time she was here I laid down a boundary and firmly told her "No, you can't boss me around in my own house."
SD asked DH to meet-up with her today to do something together. DH told her no. Let the gnashing of teeth and tearing of clothes in despair begin!
Dh told me he doesn't want to deal with traffic, or her, today. He is worried she won't take no for an answer and will badger him about the what's and why's.
I knew when I was embroiled in step-crap/toxic BM crap years ago that it was all a distraction. I knew that BM wanted it all to be a distraction (negative attention is better than no attention, right?). When she realized she could not control our lives, her behavior seemed to evolve into trying to make sure she disrupted our lives and "punished" us enough that she would be a major focus. The skids followed suit. . . her little army marching in lockstep.
When you catch the SS in a lie multiple times to the point that I'm saying to SS why are you lieing over stupid stuff? The answer used to be I don't know but now it's the oh that's right I as in SS can't do anything right. Yes that is correct I tell you to put A where B is and if you do it at all you put A outside in the grass no where near B. So what am I supposed to think? When it happens 5 to 30 times, yes I think you are stupid. Just sits in bed all day everyday playing video games. Then the husband/bio dad complains about being in the middle.
SS and fiancee are in their mid 30's. They have undergone 8 cycles of IVF and finally have a bun in the oven, due in August.
One might think that the arrival of a precious baby, to a mother whose ability to carry a pregnancy to term is risky, would be all they could want.
HCBM was arrested again. Refused DUI test. This is the second arrest where alcohol was involved within months of each other. The court system doesn't care. Still waiting on a hearing. SD and SS have behavior issues because of their lifestyle with their alcoholic mom. It's like reprogramming every time the kids come back. We have to teach them to be respectful, kind, no showboating for attention we live in a home of respect for each other... It's exhausting and my tank is on empty from such a cruel summer schedule.
Over the last few weeks and again two weeks ago my MIL expressed that SIL's MIL will harp that she always knew SIL was not good enough for her son. For my MIL that my SIL and her STBXH were HS sweethearts, stayed together from across the country when my bride took guardianship of her sister when SIL was 17 and we paid for her university studies for a year as she was in our family, battled to return to each other, had kids and created a family has been a major point of pride for my MIL. This is apparently a regular point of discussion with her coworkers at work. How this romance novel rel
YSD26 is still ligering in the area, housesitting. DH spent a day out with her. I did not ask quesitons. For example, "Was she a complete brat?" I don't need to know. And if they had a nice time, I don't need to know that either. I don't want to hear it. I know that I won't get the real story anyway because DH wears his rose colored glasses, most of the time, until he has had enough and finally reaches a breaking point.
Looking at life right now, I feel truly blessed. My health issues have healed, I have a home I love, my parents are with me, my family is healthy and doing well, I now see who my friends are (and arent). Ive learned some valuable lessons. Ive learned about my spouse and his very dark side that I didnt "see" before.
However there are a few things that I would take out of this life. A jealous and badgering spouse, who wakes me up on my birthday at 6 am pacific time "you are on 2 dating sites, I know you are hooking up!!"
DH had way too many beers yesterday and was talking up a storm. I kind of had things figured out about what transpired.
BM became unblocked because she was with SD's and sending him texts and he wasn't responding. SD's called him at work and asked if BM was blocked because "they" were trying to send him something. Because SD's were involved he unblocked her with SD walking him through how to do it, although I know that he knows how to do this.
Typically this means that you are "officially a Couple".
In my case, today, my husband posted on Facebook that he is "letting me go" using my name and everything, as a caption to a post of our wedding photo.
After a few weeks of posting tik toks and memes about cheating and lies and letting go.
Its been a rough month.
Ive been feeling sadness, regret, relief, disbelief, fear, anger all in an endless rotation.
Im no longer going to be a stepmonster.
Im no longer going to have to deal with all that step life has to offer.
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