Some background information...I started dating my husband when my SD's were 6 and 9yrs old and at the time he had 50/50 custody. We were married 2yrs later and the day before our wedding his ex-wife served us with a motion for full custody and ultimate decision making over the girls' lives.
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Recent Blog Posts
I really like my therapist. We got off on a tangent and I told a few stories about when we were first dating and married with regards to parenting and the skids, and how DH reacts. She very accurately observed that it seems DH has a lot of anxiety, takes things personally, and wants to off-load his bad feelings on me (like blaming me) but also that he wants me to soothe his anxieties about his kids in general. And that I should stop doing that. He wants someone else to be responsible (including something he's trying to get me to decide for him right now that is almost 100% his call).
My wife and I have been together almost 14 years, so far it’s our longest relationship either one has had. I have two previous marriages as well as she, it’s our third time. I have kids from previous marriages, one is over 24 the other two are soon to be 18 and 15, they live with their mother. My wife has one that she gave up for adoption( not of her choice when she was 13) by her mother, child is now over 24 yrs olds. Her first marriage she had a son, first child that she got to keep after the adoption.
Haven't been here in a long while and hope all of you wonderful step parents are doing well.
DH and BM have been going back and forth on CS for over a year. DH FINALLY realized his lawyer is an idiot after consulting with three new lawyers, all of whom told him his lawyer dropped the ball and we are now on the hook for a big chunk of change.
SD has gotten to the point where she blatantly ignores me. I have been trying to handle this in a mature, calm manner. I’m working hard on not letting this upset &/or anger me.
While home, she avoids me at all cost and doesn’t communicate with me other than occasionally say “bye” when leaving. I handle the day-to-day operation of the home, including medical appts., school correspondence, etc. for the children. She recently sent me a text message (even though we LIVE in the same house and she sees me daily), asking me to sign a form allowing her to drive/park at school.
So if any of you remember the baby gate incident - where SD had zero reaction to DS1 falling down the stairs in front of her - heres the contrast in behavior when DH is watching. All of us were outside, ODS9 is playing with DS1. SD is nearby doing her own thing. DS1 was going down his toddler size slide and must have went off the side of it or something along those lines. He wasnt actually hurt but it must have scared him or something. I went over to help him and SD didnt react at all. DH had been in the front yard and came back to see what DS was crying for.
Last night around midnight, I walked out of my bedroom and SD (almost 10) stood in the hallway looking like a deer caught in headlights. I asked her what she was doing and she said she was in the bathroom because she was thirsty. I was confused, but she went to her room and that was that. This morning, I asked her what she was doing and she said that she put her mouth on the faucet to drink water from the bathroom sink. The kitchen is LITERALLY around the corner from the bathroom. Some of you may disagree, but I think that’s stupid. Makes no sense to do that.
My stepdaughter and I get along, as long as she gets her way. She acts like this is her house and drops her kids off too much to suit me. My husband got furious with me when I told him he to to tell her he needs to see if we have any plans. I feel like an outsider. I have two grandchildren that do come to see us, but because they are involved in sports they can’t come too often. My daughter picks them up when she tells me she will.. We never know how long the kids will be here when my step daughter drops hers off. My husband doesn’t mind them dropping in so frequently but I do.