So it has been a rough week with BM's abuse allegations, stressing out about how to tell SS about my pregnancy, and planning for SS to visit in one week. On top of it all, I came down with a nasty sinus infection and have been fighting that off since Sunday. Not to mention, finding out I was pregnant, while planned, has been an adjustment. I am feeling better after being sick and I feel more at ease (thanks to this site) about how to handle BM and SS, but regardless, I'm ready for life to slow down a little.
So aside from our recent allegations of abuse, I have been stressing out about how to tell SS9 that DH and I are expecting. We only see SS 6 weeks per year and we don't necessarily want to tell him over the phone because it will allow BM to control the narrative once SS hangs up the phone.
BM is expecting DH and I to have a conversation with SS during our next visitation in two weeks regarding allegations of abuse that SS supposedly told BM.
SS9 went home on Saturday. We ended up having a great visit at the tail end of visitation. He was so adjusted. We went camping, had SS' friend sleepover, built a box fort, had nightly movies nights, and went swimming. SS even made a comment about me being the glue that holds our family together and he reminisced about all the nice things I've done for him. Before SS left, he gave me a huge, tight hug that I thought was going to break my ribs. He smiled and told me he would see me in two weeks and that he loved me.
SS9 has been a rollercoaster for the last week and a half. Heck, he has been a rollercoast for the 8.5 years I have known him. Some days he is condesending, argumentative, and rude like BM, and other days he is sweet, kind, and appears settled/well-adjusted.
We are halfway through our two week visit with SS9. I am just ready for him to go home. He has been whiny, argumentative, and just a little asshole in general. SS can never be wrong and if he is, he claims that we "misunderstood." Nothing we do for him is ever good enough. He is a mini BM, which is to be expected, but makes him more of a pain to deal with. He spent most of the week asking where his tracker smart watch is. DH told him it is turned off and in his bag (in our room) and that he does not need it.
SS9 has been here for 4 days. Last night, we watched Disney's Haunted Mansion, the 2003 PG movie with Eddie Murphy, about a curse on the mansion that Eddie Murphy and his family have to break, reuniting the ghost owner with his ghost true love. SS seemed to really enjoy it and he was the one who requested we watch it.
SS9 has arrived... and he is mopey. I'm sure BM PASed him real good before pick up today. I helped him unpack his small bag to find another perfume covered stuffed animal and a kid's smartwatch with phone call, texting, and location tracking capabilities. SS showed me how it works and BM and her GF's contacts are listed as "Mom" and "Mama" in the watch... I looked at it. It has tons of voice recordings saved with "We love you so much!" and other random messages. Oh and it has an SOS feature for emergency response and guess who's number is programmed for SOS... not BM, but GF.
DH has to pick SS9 up at noon tomorrow and SS will be here for two weeks. I don't envy DH's 8 hour round-trip drive. I always hate preparing for SS to visit because it's stressful. I always feel the need to clean everything and get all the errands done, like grocery shopping, beforehand. It always feels like such a big production because SS is here so infrequently and his visits completely throw off our routine. While I mostly love his visits and enjoy spending time with SS, the preparation beforehand always increases my anxiety.
So DH is picking SS up this Saturday for our first two week block of summer visitation. If you recall, BM flipped a lid a few weeks back about DH exercising two two week blocks because of SS' football obligations. We finally got everything sorted so SS will be here for two weeks starting Memorial weekend and two weeks at the end of June/first week of July, but it wasn't without a fight.