Yes, it's definitely happening with SD13 full on.
SD13, DH and I were having dinner last night and DH and I were talking about plans for the following weekend when YSD would be at our home. SD says, "But I won't be here, I'll be at mommy's." We both said, "What are you talking about?" Well, apparently BM has made plans not only this coming weekend (she has the SDs for Easter, no biggie) but also the following weekend, on DH's weekend.
So trip overall was about what I expected. OSD was grumpy, complainy, food aversiony, hatey, and just unpleasant to be around. Never brushed her teeth although she did shower, but not often enough. I overheard her say to YSD that she used to like flying but not anymore and that it's too hard to get to Europe. Even better sweetie because it's never going to happen with us again. She couldn't name one thing she liked when asked.
OSD had a miraculous recovery from her illness and was back to normal the afternoon we left. Amazing!
DHsis had a good chat with DH this morning and essentially said the same things I have, but from her perspective. It was good. She also totally got me, like, it's so stressful having her here and her attitude is over the top. Imagine living with that I added. "God." Was the response. Anyway OSD, I think, still doesn't know we are going away tonight. DH tried blaming me for not telling her...um no.
Now OSD is throwing up ... Oh joy
Will update you later...more family arrived.
Trip is still ok, DH sis giving alone time now and then. OSD very critical of DH who just says nothing ... It's so wierd to watch. Yesterday both SDs freaked out we didn't know which train we were going to catch, even after explaining open ended tix and vacation...no worry. DH was p*ssed. We had to block them in the restaurant booth otherwise they would have taken off to the station themselves. On the other hand that would have been better....lol.
LoL you guys!
At DH's sister's place, it is gorgeous!
I'm having a good time, not great, but better here. SD15 is being goid, on good behavior so far, but the veneer is cracking.
She pretty much is acting like a normal teen, but since she's in high school she is grown up now (her words). Her diet has not changed (all carbs and two eggs in five days...NO teeth brushed). DH had to take the lead in food finding which p*ssed him off after he had to deal with them. DH sister and I decided on dinner in tonight since there's so many food issues.
...DH couldn't say no. "It would be worse if she didn't go, this is the better option."
Then tried to gaslight me for not "being supportive" of his decision.
But I held strong, did not agree, reiterated that I will not put up with a crap attitude and that it's up to him to inform his sister. And I will not put on a fake smile and pretend all is wonderful, but I will not let it ruin my trip.
Of course she could just not show but I think she will be there.
So DH had a little text exchange with OSD yesterday evening, letting her know she needed to spend some time at our home this coming weekend before the trip to engage with us and talk with him. Her answer, "?" and "I have engaged with (both of you)..." then said she was simply too busy all weekend. Her comment about engagement is laughable because she hasn't spoken one word to me in a year and I think her idea of "engagement" is DH being in her presence. He then replied, directly "Do you want to come on this trip?" Zero reply - her other texts were close together.
From leaving on our trip and DH is still trying to decide if SD15 is going or not.
DH told me after his dinner (!) and a movie with her that she was rude, silent, entitled, full of herself, and over the top dismissive. Didn't thank him for dinner, popcorn (she just stood in line without him until he came over and bought it for her - didn't even ask), his time, driving her, anything. Told him she wanted to go on the trip only for ONE thing (that would be about 1.5 hours long, max.) over 10 days. And complained about the travel schedule.
Sooooooo, DH received a few texts from BM this weekend and one doozy from OSD(15) as well.
BM apparently told him she and OSD ‘had a lot of talks’ this weekend about the situation with DH.
She mentioned that OSD’s ‘decision’ was ‘the best she could offer at this time.’
OSD’s text was basically telling DH he could take her to a movie this coming Saturday.
DH was NOT HAPPY. BUT on the plus side, we were able to have a really good conversation about it.