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I am getting frustrated again

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Last night at dinner YSD asked if her food was cooked and picking at it.  We were ALL eating the same thing.  I said,"Yes, it's cooked. We're all eating the same thing, it's actually hot."  DH then says, "Oh, you can put it in the microwave if you want to just for a minute or two."  Totally undermining me AGAIN.  Jeezus - I cannot say ANYTHING remotely adult to YSD or DH practically throws himself in front of her to dismantle my authority as an adult in the house. 

Hold the Phone!

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DH is actually reading "Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex!" He's done with the first chapter. My mouth literally dropped open when I saw that. GOOD. After over a year of me asking he's FINALLY educating himself on PAS!


OSD and Texting

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Last night DH told me that he had video conferenced with BM. Ok. He said that she could see him but he couldn't see her and all his settings were ok. I looked at him like, really? Oh. Maybe she had her camera off so you couldn't see HER? Jeez DH, she's not a good person! Of course I think OSD was right there with her.... anyway.

Food situation

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As YSD is reverting back to her child picky behavior, it's going to be interesting moving forward. There is no chicken. I managed to buy a whole chicken to roast later this week, but we're eating the last of the other chicken tonight, and stretching it with tofu in a stir fry. After this it's beef and pork. Both of which she has lately stated she doesn't like any longer.

Well honey, this is IT. Welcome to making do with what is available.

Good thing DH does most of the cooking when she's here because I might lose it.

Disengagement Reasons 257 & 258

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* Reason I withdraw from spending food $ indiscriminately and make sure DH pays me back for some of it; I do the majority of both food shopping and basic household misc. shopping (towels, linens, replacing a broken doorknob, etc.).  If it involves a major trip and food that is needed when YSD is here, he pays me at least half.  Household stuff I just buy unless it's a major deal like a bunch of new towels since his family is visiting and we didn't have enough guest towels. 

Shocking selfishness

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Yeah, so DH complaint today was that YSD, now 14, didn't jump on the choice to spend Sunday with dad to celebrate her turning 14. I shouldn't have commented....but I said that well, you gave her a choice, you cannot be mad that she made a choice.

Then it was well she should know better. I said, why? Both SDs have always been able to make their own choices, which in kids is self-serving. They're not taught otherwise. So why would they make a choice that isn't what they want, but may be better for all?

Birthday Wishes

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So today is YSD's birthday.


She decided weeks ago that she wanted her party at BMs house, because BM - and because two of her friends there have helicopter parents and don't allow over-nights (at age 13/14).  So fine, DH said OK.  Of course with no make-up time again for that lost time.

He spoke with BM a couple days ago and they agreed YSD would come back to spend time with DH on Sunday afternoon/evening for her birthday so he could have time to celebrate too.  She would come back with her friends who live in our area.  Easy.  HA!

YSD and next Year

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I called it - not going into too much detail but she's likely going to HS near BM, of course!

DH found out last night she's going to the tour of that school. 

DH has also NOT arranged for her to go on a tour of the school near us...but I think they might do that as a class in the middle school anyway.  YSD has not said a word about it.  She's clearly keeping to herself, barely talking with us and not wanting to get together with any of her friends from her current school.