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Advise-I don’t want to celebrate SS

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I have been working really hard at, I guess,  disengaging. I have told SO at this point I don't want anything to do with his kids. I have stopped going to sporting events, I don't ask about them , etc. I have shut him down when he starts to bring them up and I say all I want to know about them is when you ,SO, won't be home because of SKs so I can plan my days.  He is definitely upset about this. Kids don't stay with us so it really isn't that hard as long as SO keeps his pie hole shut about them. But I am sure SO had been begging SS to come down and hit balls in the garage for practice.

Update to SS disrespect

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Recap. SS is extremely disrespectful to SO and BM had added on.  I ended up being away for 5 days. I needed it , but I do like to be in my own space with all my fur babies and not at someone else's house.  SO told BM he is not taking SS to anything but actual games and it will only be half of them, she has to do her share. No more private practices.  He told her he is not going to give anything for SS driving because SS is too immature. He will not pay or drive SS to basketball if he decides to stay on the team.

Adding to SS disrespect

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Now BM is adding to the disrespect issue. I have not been filled on everything but she text SO to tell him he has to take SS to this pool party. She then started on him saying he is a bad dad and that the kids can't stand him . She said the last time SD watched the pets we left no food for her to eat. We always , always specifically ask her what she wants and I got the things the night before we left since I had to go to store anyway. She doesn't even eat what we buy. The time before she ate one tiny bowl of salad, and I mean tiny. And she is paid for watching the pets.

Again with SS disrespect

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How bad do you have to be treated before you say no more?  I am sure you are sick of hearing me about this but anyway.  We were at a looong tournament this weekend. Sitting in the scorching sun to see SS barely play. It cost us around $900 for the weekend. That doesn't include the team fees we already pay.  Then SS went to a private camp that cost $400 to work with college coaches when we got home . He didn't like it. Yesterday SO made sure he was home from work to take SS to practice.When he went to pick him up it was running behind.  SS was up to bat and didn't swing at 6 strikes.

I wonder what he is feeling

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Well I might get some grief for this post. Several weeks ago someone I dated for a few months before my now SO, reached out to me. I had planned his oldest sons graduation party and the second one just graduated. He wanted to find out a certain vendor I used. I think he could have found one on his own but whatever.  I did answer and gave him the information.  The company still had all my information and I was getting all the updates. I would forward to him.  He would respond with how well I did the party before etc. Norhing bad.

Driving to hang out with friends

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Just wondering how far you would drive a child (remember this child appreciates nothing SO does for him)  to hang out with "friends".  SS has ruined his relationship with his school friends and says all other kids in his grade are "weird". He was invited to one of the kids houses that play on his travel team.  They live around 40  mins away on back roads. SO hates to drive in the dark. This will be over 2 1/2 hours driving to hang out.  I am not saying a word . Maybe it will be a one and done but if this becomes an all summer thing it will drive me crazy.

Should this bother me?

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As most of you know it has been rough for me dealing with BMs non stop communication with SO. It has drastically improved  on how or if he responds. Then this happened. There is a  ton of gossip from a dad about a coach on a team SS played on 5 or so years ago. I had heard about the issues in the past and then the dad posted on social media. Very long story. SO asked told me about it and then I said would read it. He is working out of town right now. We then discussed it and he he said don't worry I won't call BM about it.  I said why would I have ever of thought that.

Miserable to be around

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I don't know what to do for myself. SS is becoming unbearable to be around.  As most of you know he is in travel baseball season which is requiring driving long hours and spending days out of town. He got to pitch one game and actually hit two times but they lost the game and he did not play again all weekend.  I go so that I am with my SO . If I didn't go to the games I wouldn't be around my SO much during this time of year..

Golf

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Can anyone tell me what is involved with golf in high school ?  I don't even know what season it is played in.  How many,  do you call it , games ?  How about practices?  What all are parents responsible for buying? Do you go and watch them play?

Attending Graduations

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One of my nephews is graduating HS and of course I am going. SO then talked about SD and another one of my nephews graduating next year. I mentioned that I hope they are not on the same day.  He said he of course has to go to SD and I said of course I have to go to my nephews. He said I can't even talk about you not going to SD and had tears in his eyes. I can't see a concern a year out. We were just having a conversation. Unfortunately I will choose my nephews over his children. I don't have a bond with his kids. My nephews are my family . What are your thoughts ?  

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