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I just came in from spending the last hour nailing up boards on my parents fence. I am so ashamed. So ashamed of the "man" I married, who lives in this house rent free (right next door to my parents), but has not lifted one finger in the last 6 months to do anything to help keep their place up.
So I had tried to call H before I went over to work on mom's fence. No answer. Left the phone here, as it involved hammer and nails and no free hands. H calls, calls and calls, 8 times in the hour it took me. Leaves a nasty voicemail, because I did not pick up the phone and answer it.
Ok, y'all, here's the cliffnotes...
H and I have fought for months about how much contact we have with bm. I've asked and demanded that it cease. He has at times tried to appease me. We've had our ups and downs and we've tried to reach agreement on everything.
H tells me yesterday that bm called him. She's been gone for a week and we've had the skids. They had their phones off and didn't return her call. So she calls H to tell him to have them call her. Supposedly that was the entirety of their conversation.
This is my first time writing...I need to vent and see if there is anyone out there who is going through my situation! My SD12 recently came to live with us full-time after her mother (if that's what you can call her) decided she is just "too depressed" to take care of her. Meanwhile, the BM has been seen around town having dinner, drinks, shopping, etc. During this transition, I was pregnant with our 2nd child. I am now dealing with some postpartum depression along with a 12 year old girl who thinks she rules the world.
The wind last night was horrid. I'm reading the book Twilight and the wind whistling thru my windows did not help my nightmare proned mind. You can only imagine my racing thoughts as my windows shook.
Little did I know that at 9:30 last night that my over active imagination would not be the only producer of unwelcome monsters. The shrillest screech of all would be that of BM's voice when my phone began to ring and I was the only helpless soul still awake to answer it.
It is always this time of year that I feel Bad for My kids Bio-Dad. When we were together he withdrew from the family. When we split is when he started to try to connect with the boys. Now, he is the Chuck E Cheese Dad. (Think low budget Disnelyland Dad) The boys like going places with dad which is fine. What I see is that they are seeing what they can get. Bio-Dad doesn't take them home to just hang out. I am not even sure where he lives. When the boys spend the night, they stay with B-D neice. They always have take-out. Its always the arcade, the movies, laser-tag or a party.
Well, F made it official! On our 2 yr anniversary, he took me out and we picked out my engagement ring, and he proposed. I'm thrilled for many things, perhaps most importantly that he saved the money to do this without any chiding from me, basically since we got the CS reduced, he'd been setting aside that money, and bought my ring outright. One of my big reservations was worrying that he could do this, manage money in general, but he's proved to me he can, and I'm thrilled.
I've noticed a strange phenomen(sp) here-the dogs!
I have a Golden, Max, as you know. H has a rat terrier. H's terrier is here when H is, but usually is with the skids at BM's. Because he tries to kill my cat.
So, I've been watching these dogs for awhile, and noticed something-and it's wierd. Now, I love animals. Including H's little dog. I have yet to meet an animal I did not love. But-these personality traits in these dogs mirror ours!
It seems that SD13 has progressed from lying to stealing. I had noticed items missing -makeup, clothes, but didn't say anything because I am so scatterbrained I lose things a lot and also I just didn't want anymore trouble!!
But her grandmother asked her about some Victorias Secret stuff she had and of course it was mine and she had taken it.
Then when cleaning her room I find some of my boxed Barbies and clothes she had taken, opened and played with.
What is the source of my misery? I married my wife 4 1/2 years ago. With her came the SD, then 9, now 13. There were challenges but everything seemed manageable. We have added BD, now 2. The last year to year and a half have been the worst of my life and the best. I love my BD more than I ever thought possible. Everything else sucks.
It's a small victory but I'll take it. It only took them a couple of days but now they're kissing butt. I guess once they ran out of the basics they realized who actually does everything around here. I'm not giving in just yet, I think it will be good for them to suffer a few more days. }:) H seems to understand that his underwear doesn't wash itself. Right now I'm going to relax in my nice clean bed and have a few chuckles.
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