Colorado Girl's Blog

A Poll: How long have you been married?

A.) Under 1 year
B.) 1-5 years
C.) 5-10 years
D.) Over 10 years
E.) Madly in love but not married

I read an interesting article in regards to the lasting ability in remarriage statistic wise. I'd like to get a feel of where you are all at.

Thank you in advance.

Oh... and I'm a C.

Revised to include the madly in love but not married folk.

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Haven't been here in a while... have to admit I'm frustrated

The mother of my stepchildren is in the process of adopting a one year old child.

The stepmother of my own children is pregnant.

My husband pays child support and has 50/50 custody, it's true 50/50 but where dad has residential for school purposes. All health insurance and daycare are his responsibility. Copays for medical and dental is 60(Dad)- 40(Mom).

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Update on Marriage Retreat.

http://www.steptalk.org/node/44621

My husband rearranged the scheduling conflicts and we are going on the retreat.

He's going to miss the first couple hours of the first night to attend one of the games but his assistant coach will take care of the two on Saturday.

Easy compromise for me. I'm going to take that Friday off and drive separately and get there early for some relaxation by the pool.

So, so excited!!!

~CG

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Marriage Retreat falls on a Skid Weekend

I found an excellent marriage retreat in my state in a BEAUTIFUL setting along with Workshops to help you strengthen your marriage.

It falls on a weekend my husband is to have his girls. They have their final softball games that weekend.

I'm not really sure of myself on if and how hard I push.

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Invisible Me

So I haven't been here in a while. I thought I pretty much had it all figured out. I think I have it pretty good. A wonderful man to call my husband and 5 kiddos that only 2 of I actually took part in the making of. BM hasn't been my problem for a really long time. There is also a new stepmama-figure in my sons' life who is just the sweetest little thing. (I can call her little cause she's 13 years my junior. ) My exH did good.

What has helped? Not what doesn't work.. but what does?

I'm creating an (online) Workshop/Discussion for (mostly) stepparents, but also for divorced parents as well.

What has worked for you?

For example, one small thing that I do personally is when BM calls I walk into a different room. That way I don't have to listen to the cackle of her voice. Helps me cope.

Any other small tidbits of advice that I can use??

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It's nagging me.

OK. We've come far. I don't expect perfection by any means. DH is keeping the fantastic peace right now because BM has agreed to let the girls go to school by our new house and until paperwork is signed, he doesn't want to rock the proverbial boat.

What works for you?

I'm reading a lot about disengaging. From the kiddos, from the ex.

I like disengaging.

She's not my exwife, I feel not a need in the world to ever see or talk to her again. I will if I must and I don't know that I truly care either way... My preference is certainly not to, but if there is no way around it? Sure.

Acceptance of Myself

I can't whistle... but I can lick my elbow.

I received an email once that says no one can do it. So like anyone reading this is probably trying to do right now, I tried it and found that I could. It's effortless for me... having something to do with short limbs and an abnormally long tasting mechanism.

It makes me special in a small, goofy, insignificant way.

I have been doing a lot of sitting and reflecting, absorbing and listening more... and talking less. I was reading an excerpt from the Tao of Pooh, and it brought me to a sort of realization.

Triangulating

My oldest SD is beautifully rambunctious at 13.

She is a little bit unruly and has begun a habit of almost triangulating her divorced parents. It's actually pretty easy to do since they can't seem to get along most of the time and spend a great deal of effort either stroking their own ego on who is a better parent.. or pointing the finger when the other makes a mistake.

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