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Recent Blog Posts
I've been blogging a lot lately b/c I feel that my life is turned completely upside-down. SD8 has been throwing an attitude toward me for a little while now, since she started seeing the socio again. I do everything for that girl and I get no appreciation. My H also gives me no appreciation. I do feel like I'm blogging about the same thing over and over but I do want to hope that things will get better.
H called last night to tell me he is now officially laid off.
He had one week a month ago of lay off, one week where he only got 19 hours...and now the other shoe has dropped.
Needless to say, things have been tight around here anyway, with the IRS garnishing 50% of his paycheck. Now no paycheck.
And he was upset because he called and told me he's on his way home and I was all excited and happy about it! :jawdrop: Who is happy and excited because their husband is coming home because he no longer has a job!!!
My husband is in a boundary deficient relationship with the borderline/bipolar mother to his three daughters. As he maintains focus on keeping her happy and healthy, his daughters thrive. BM thrives. I think he's satisfied with his level of involvement with soothing the mother of his children, I can't really tell. He tells the world that she is "great" now, but then will continuosly complain of her shortcomings. He's also conveyed that my discontent is the only thing that makes him unhappy.
I feel blue. I feel yellow. Together I seem to be green.
A good friend of mine told me this yesterday:
If you put a frog in a pot of boiling water, he will jump out immediately. However, if you put the same frog in a pot of regular water and slowly heat it up, the frog will just stay in until it burns to death.
So my H is in apparently serious violation of the visitation agreement btw. him and the socio regarding SD8. Well b/c of socio's abuse of SD my H wasn't allowing socio to get her, well socio didn't have problems with that. Until a month ago when she filed papers that my H was in violation. So the consequences of this is jail time. Well we have full custody of SD and the socio doesn't want custody, great mom huh?
This morning after Zippy's X-box hootinanny last night.
DH-"ENDORA-ZIPPY16.5 JUST FAINTED IN MY ARMS IN THE KITCHEN"!!!
(me picturing some kind of "Gone With the Wind Scene"-nearly cracked up and spit my coffee into the phone)
Composed myself and said
Calmly: "DH are you taking him to emergency?" (with all the ambulances available-world move over Zippy is dying-figuring that would be DH usual response).
DH is all a'tizzy-unable to speak
I ask calmly "When did Zippy last eat?"
DH and I went to SS's Parent teacher conference yesterday. BM usually schedules her own conference. SS it seems is worse than ever. Bullying other students, grades are slipping, and arguing w/ teacher in front of the class etc. His teacher is pulling her hair out due to his behavior. DH and I told teacher that we would address this on our end, but delicately stated that we could only control what happens in our home. We have been very careful not to speak negatively about BM to teachers because no matter how bad she is, we don't want them to be caught in the middle.
So we had our first counseling session since I had the talk with my wife about SD’s cell phone photos. Go back and read the last 2 blogs if you want details.
The counselor laid into DW pretty hard. She told her I was being a dad, and a damn good dad, and she should be singing my praises for what I did. When SD gets the boom dropped she should sing my praises to SD. (not that SD will care at that point) She offered some actions I am 100% on board with how she would handle the situation.
You know from that Fireproof movie???
I'm figuring I'll give this one last go, try one last thing, and at the end of the 40 days if I'm not happy I'm going *anywhere* away from here.
I ordered the book today and it should be here shortly, then we'll see...
Even if it doesn't help save my relationship, I'll know that I've tried all I could and maybe find peace with him as he is so that I can leave w/o feeling guilty.
Yesterday SFIL came over, he wanted to give us a few things that had belonged to MIL. She had made a photo album and scrapebook for H to give him for his birthday in June. The album was baby and childhood pics, the scrapebook was from his time in the Army. I thought is was very sweet and thoughtful, he loved it. So SFIL and H were talking about MIL and what type of headstone should be bought when sd comes home. Since no one was paying attention to her she starts acting like a 3yr old. The more we tried to talk the louder and more manic she got.
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