Well, here's some food for thought as I have been thinking about this for days and days. I had written a couple of blog entries in the last two days but accidentally deleted them before I got them posted. SD's biomom sent my husband a ridiculous melodramatic email at work stating that SD was being harassed by me and that my husband needed to stop me or she would look into filing a restraining order. My husband fired back about all of SD's deflammatory remarks on the public blogs and that I had the right to respond. So, it has been an aggravating, turbulent couple of days.
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Greetings to everyone here! I found this site by searching the internet on something that would allow me to vent about my stepson. I feel bad doing this but he is like nothing I've ever seen. He has known me since he was 8. It took awhile for him to warm up to me but we got through it. I noticed that his father (my husband now) pretty much let him have his way all the time. Discipline is not a big thing in our home. We've been married for almost 3 years.
Well, it has been quite a week. I am a horrid, flaunting, stepmother. But I do have one stepson, that is still talking to me and he is coming to visit next month. And for that, I am grateful that he finally got himself together. Because it took a long time but at least he had more sense and didn't let his anger get the best of him. And I have 3 dogs that vary in age who are all sweet that I referee who are glad for my attention. And a husband that loves me and tells me don't worry about my SD, he will deal with her later.
Well, it is Friday evening. I finally got a comment from my SD on her blog directly. Of course, everything was completely turned around. i.e. I, am at fault for everything, of course, she takes no responsibility, it is our fault for leaving, yaddy, yaddy. I took her Dad away and out of the state. How dare I send her a Christmas card? Why couldn't her Dad be bothered to even sign the card? How dare we not call her for her birthday? Never mind all the insultive things she has done to us over the last years. Hey, that's okay.
I have to laugh or I'd been completely screaming and losing my mind. I have been writing about the ongoing tale of the xanga chatterbox site with my SD. Only to find out that of course, we are back with the narcissistic behavior, everything is of course, stepmom's fault, I am "flaunting her father" at her, excuse me. Hello. Then my SD best friend states I am jealous of SD when I am asking if her dog's are okay, and asking nonthreatening questions to her, making nonthreatening comments. (to SD). It's just too crazy.
Well, I almost have to laugh. The only sentence in my SD's blog last night was that she wished she had a magic 8 ball. But she was definitely interested in the xanga chatterbox. But then her best friend took over and wrote a smart comment thinking I was someone else. Well, I posted a note back, saying she didn't know what she was talking about, Erin had know me for a long time, and she need to stay out of where she wasn't needed, that Erin would think for herself.
I don't know sometimes why I keep pushing at my SD even though she's been gone from the house for over an year and a half with all the trouble she's into but maybe it is because I hope that sooner rather than later, it will dawn on her that all of the people around her, who are trying to tell her that she has "issues" are correct. I left a message in her xanga chatterbox in a roundabout fashion but if she knew who it was, she would never have read it.
Well, it has now been almost three months now since we've moved here to Georgia and there have been some changes here in our household. One major change that was sudden, traumatic, and completely unexpected was the sudden, tragic loss of our eight year old greyhound to seizures/stroken on February 6, 2006. We rescued him on Superbowl weekend five years ago, and ironically, it was Superbowl weekend, that I found him, in convulsions in our master bedroom having seizures.
Well, in a nutshell, for those of us, with one or more stepchildren who have left and gone back to their biological parents where life is "far better" or shall I say the grass is greener.....accentuate the positive. It's been over a year now and my stepson is still talking with my husband now and that is pretty consistent and he is coming back to visit at Easter (I think with his girlfriend in April). So, 50% is better than nothing, and you can never tell if in a couple of years, my SD may clean herself up.
A question keeps running through my mind as to how much do I really know, or rather how well do I really know my stepdaughter? It is like after she left and when back to her Mom's over a year and a half ago, she became like Jekyll and Hyde. Someone I feel that I obviously never really knew. The things she verbally says as well as writes are so abusive and nasty that I feel they can't be coming from the same young lady I once knew. Is it the drugs, the company she keeps, peers, or what?