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Recent Blog Posts
i am wondering what exactly are my rights as a stepmom. My husbands ex beleives that I should basically have nothing to do with her son. He has been having some behavioral problems in school lately and my husband has been trying to get the teacher to call him back with no results. So i called her twice ( with no results) and today my husbands ex calls raising heck saying that i have no business ever calling the school or contacting his teacher.
So I pick up my stepdaughter this weekend for breakfast with Santa and she very quickly tells me that her mom's bf needs to be out of their house by this Friday- SD says that mommy is acting really different than before and given the fact that she is 11- I ask her what she meant by that. She states mommy is different- she doesn't talk much anymore, X-Mas tree isn't up, she doesn't answer the phone, etc. So obviously mom is depressed. Let me remind you this is #2 man that left her for another woman.
I am so upset...BM keeps signing SD & SS up for sports and THEY DO NOT WANT TO PLAY! let me clarify.....they do not want to play on the weekends they are with us. According to SD they don't mind going when they are with BM because she says all they do is stay stuck in the house so going to their games gets them out of the house.
DH is supposed to have custody of SS this year~ from 12 Christmas Eve until the same time Christmas Day. Last month, BM emailed us saying "I am telling you right now that you will NOT have him for Christmas Eve", because she said that's when her household opens their gifts. Then they got into this whole exchange with DH saying he should be here and BM fighting him. Then she said her husband agreed with my husband BUT the order doesn't say she has to bring him. We said the order doesn't say we have to either, but the judge did say it needs to be worked out between the two.
X's GF (kids step-mom) called me out of the blue last night to discuss my son's Christmas concert plans. X is out of town....this week.
In the past..we go to the day-time performance because our schedule's are more flexible...and it is less crowded. Giving thier Dad..and GF last year..the evening tickets....
We were going to go to both ... because I believe he should have 'his people' in the audience when he performs and not strangers.... and it just didn't occur to me that she would go without thier Dad.
Brief recap...ss lived with us last year and went to middle school in our district. After ss learned that we follow through with discipline, he quickly decided that he wanted to move back in with bm. Bm made him live here the entire year. In June, ss went to bm's/gma's for entire summer. At the last minute (late August), bm said to dh..."I know I shouldn't let ss make adult based decisions, but...he wants to live with me." So bm pulled him out of our school, enrolled him in her school district.
I had a conversation with BM today which has left me down in the dumps at best. While I try to take the things she says and does in stride, I was genuinely concerned with what she said this time. We were discussing what progress had been made regarding the situation, and of course she used it as an opportunity to start an argument though I asked her kindly not to. Here's a transcript:
This is probably the main reason that custody schedule gets ignored...we do not have our own vehicle, BM does. We would ask our close friends and family to help, but currently they have been having problems too and also do not have vehicles. So for now we mostly get around by the public buses, or walking.
How can ex complain about not having enough money to buy ss clothes, school supplies when she receives child support money every month????? She is complaining that she can't keep buying him those things for him cause money is tight. She is suppose to be using the child support money $400/mo. for ss not for her stupid expenses or debts! Is she taking her frustrations out of us cause she is dead broke.....she is now finally realizing that she can't be spending her money on lavish things.
Well, I got my first batch of Christmas cookies finished. Stepson watched the Grinch while I was baking. Normally, he doesn't eat sweets before bedtime but since we were having a Christmas moment I bent the rules. Of course I made him choose a piece of fruit to eat first. Then he just HAD to have this sweet tart candy cane. It was blueberry and when he was finished with it, it looked like he had just eaten a smurf!!! He thought it was hilarious! Plus, he got to sample a cookie and he really liked it!
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