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A couple of people today have written blogs about the perennial problem of getting their BFs/DHs to set and maintain healthy boundaries with their exes. I just found an article that I thought I'd share -- it does a good job of explaining why and how to set healthy boundaries with the ex. Maybe some of you will want to print it out and have your BF/DH read it -- it could spark some "a-ha" moments (one can only hope!).
http://www.authorsden.com/visit/viewArticle.asp?id=1298
BB
Reading Chai's blog today made me really pause and wonder who I'm really angry at. The truth is its myself. I know that I have been very resentful of BM, and even DH and the skids at times. I have been so angry that both DH and BM have these jobs that I have felt they have used to shirk the responsibility of being a parent (DH is a pilot and is often gone for days on end, while BM is an EMT who works 24 hr. shifts and whom the court has determined is entitled to only have the kids on her days off). This has left me, who works and also has a 2 year old, to be the responsible one.
I'm so desperate to get my thoughts out that I can't help myself from posting here because I know so many of you will at least understand where I'm coming from. I vowed not to post again, not so much because of privacy, but because I don't want DH coming around to cause drama, but I feel so weak right now.
I haven't been a member here for very long and I really haven't posted much about the things I have to deal with on a daily basis. But I have come to a point in my life were I could really use some suggestions on what to do. I am the type of person who lets everything build up inside until I can't take it any longer and I feel as though I am at my breaking point.
How can BM make up lies and say that BD hurt his daughter on purpose. Since BM dad is a cop they have handled it like he was a criminal from the begining. I am confused know why the charges can't be dropped but instead they are using them against him in order for her to gain full custody from a 50/50 situation.
Can anyone tell me what this means. It was updated today on our court records. The attorney filed
SUBMISSION REGARDING PROGRAM FOR LITIGANTS IN FAMILY COURT!!!
Please help...
SS12 lost his cell phone and BM found it a week later when she was folding his laundry. Too funny. The cell phone went through the washer and dryer...hehehe.
SS12 did even care he had lost it, I think he was relieved since BM calls him all the time any way.
Glad it happened to BM. BM would have been on the war path if it had happened on our watch.
~BettyRay
FH and I have a good relationship. We get along, we laugh, we have sexual chemistry, etc. He is good to me. There isn't much more that I can ask for...
Except this-I hate that everyday he texts/calls BM. Usually call is 3 minutes max. Sometimes its more than once a day, but not often. Or he will text. Never both. I get frustrated because he is always the one initiating.
I know it seems small. But she has done ALOT to me over the years. Completely disregarded my existence. And I have tried to maintain because I don't want the children caught in all this mess.
So recently my BF asked BM about a new guy who has been hanging around. This guy has been with her to pick up SD1 three times in a row. BM said that he is "just a friend and that she feels bad cause he doesn't have a lot of other friends and she was trying to get rid of him." Last night when they came to pick up SD1 BM whispered something to him, his reply was "Its up to you how much you say." Then she says that he is looking at buying a house and apparently there are rentable rooms in the house where she is intending on moving to.
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