Visitation was yesterday for the first time in three weeks and BM went WAAAY too far. She sent me 25 emails all ranging from "SS hates you and doesn't want to be around you", "If you are around my son at all today I will get a restraining order on you", "You have a phone at home so you better learn to use it", "SS will NOT be going out of town", to "Do you like your hair short?" She sent BF 8 or so emails, but the worst of them came at night after SS was dropped back off.

I have tried really really hard not to moan and b*tch too much in my time here, but tonight I REALLY need someone to either talk me down or build me up, I don't care which. I'll listen either way.

I'm sure you all know there's always a constant stream of events and actions that happen in our lives that just really tick off. From bad hygiene to choices in hair or makeup, but when you add those things on top of something that hits you harder, you just break. And that's where I am now. Geez, now where to start....

Last week SS was put on ADD meds, great! We've gone through a ton to help him out at school and such (we make up for what he doesn't do at his mother's house on our week=very stressful). So, Friday they get the prescription. She (bm) had the kids last week. She, bm, didn't call at all after the appointment (we picked them up this afternoon) which is unusual for her because there is usually some drama that goes with getting the boys for the week (she couldn't possibly make this easy on us).

I was reading some posts that were put up a few days ago....about a t.v. show where a woman gave custody of her child to the father......I wish I saw that show. You all do not know how much I needed to read something like that....and all your responsis were surprisingly positive. For the past 2 years I have felt like an absolute "good for nothing" for letting my kids go live with their father. My decision was based only on their future...my ex makes the $$ to support them in the way they deserve, and it has strengthend his bond with them.