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A weekend feels like I lived a lifetime.
Here is where we are at today:
Friday I told husband that I dont like being the task mistress, it just never works out well for me, because years of not being supported and years of being ignored. Passive agressive ignore the texts stuff. Then I get irritated, react, she plays hurt feelings victim, husband swoops in to comfort her against the meanie, same ole play out.
Last I posted I was desperately hoping SD30 and SD26 would not even realize it was DS18's graduation. But they did - they follow him on social media and have some contact with him. My fear was that they would use the occasion to make it all about themselves, because that's what they do. When I heard from DUH that the oldest one had asked I told him ultimately it was up to DS and he wanted them to come, but to make sure she STAYED IN HER LANE. This was my moment, not hers. Then the younger one asked him and I said the same thing - make sure she understands to STAY IN HER LANE.
Nothing major has happened lately (we'll see if that changes when school starts next week), but I have some rambling thoughts.
We talked to SS12 tonight for our regular twice weekly FaceTime. He was sort of quiet, like normal. DH told SS last week that he would be arriving early for Labor Day weekend pick-up to watch SS practice, bringing snacks and drinks for the team to enjoy after practice. Tonight, SS nervously asked DH to not bring snacks and drinks.
SD17 is entering her senior of high school. She went from wanting to stay home and commuting too going to private out of state schools costing 70k a year. This is completely outside her realm and blowout occurred because I gave my two cents off the rip.
SOs ex SIL who is an APRN is offering to tour colleges with SD. He refuses to take time off after I told him he should... his response is well she's offering....
Terrible IMO.
No need to respond to this post since you’ve all done so on my blog of 27th July. Dad went to heaven last night. I thought that I’d done my grieving during the last few weeks of his EOL decline but I was wrong; still have a long way to go.
Prior to DH attempting to end his life a few weeks ago, had a trip planned to CO which was a very much-needed break from skid-related stress, change of scenery, and to see my best friends. I was struggling too honestly and needed to try and get myself in a better headspace. DH talked me into still going and said he was 100% not going to do anything to hurt himself. I did believe him.
...has left the building.
Shell be on her way to college in six days. DH did good with her while she was here.
They talked, actually talked. He told her he and I were having some personal things to deal with and this I was in the guest room. He's out to dinner with her now, one last time before she goes back to BMs. She ate out TWICE while here, astounding.
So Chef has a new doctor that he likes. He is not pushy and militant like the former doctor. I noticed the difference when I went to him as well.
Chef is back on a new blood pressure medicine and on a statin for cholesterol which seems to have a calming effect! I'm not sure what it is about these meds but he has been actually sensible and reasonable (caveat to the best of Chef's ability which is not much).
I have to tell someone this because I need it off of my mind. SO will not let me be about not wanting to be involved with his kids right now. He pleaded with SD to go out to dinner this weekend and she finally said she will try. Not even a yes. He told me I have to go. Yes it became an argument. Then he tells me that I need to pick a day to volunteer at a game for SS. I told him I said I was done going to any games. He said he will show me the dates I can choose from. I said did you not hear me I am not doing that. He said it can wait a few days before I decide what night. Ugh.