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Recent Blog Posts
She is clearly not over DH, which is understandable. He's a wonderful man, that's why I married him. But SD7 told me last night at dinner that her BM told her to lie and tell people that me and DH aren't married.
WTF? Why would she do that? I'll tell you why- I had to explain to SD7 what "ashamed" means. BM is ashamed that she f***ed up her marriage to DH and doesn't want to acknowledge that someone else has stepped up to the plate. I told SD7 not to worry, and that she's not in trouble because she was just listening to her mom.
I remarried a year ago. Never having lived with my new husband before I married him. He has three kids aged 17, 19 and 10. First two girls and last a boy. They are the messiest, laziest kids I have ever met. They leave their soiled panties on the floor, leave dishes all over the house and binge eat then stick their sweet papers anywhere they can to hide it. They have interests in nothing but TV and play station. When they visit every second weekend I try to ignore it all.
How many of you suffer from depression? What do you do or how do you overcome it? I've looked online to see what the signs were, and well it pretty much explained what I'm feeling and how I feel often.
I can say whenever we have SD6 I notice my mood changes and my feeling for SO change. I'm feeling blah 
So happy he got a job. It is just to pay cs til the business takes off. I mean we have orders bur we have to wait til the babies are ready to go.
We pulled 2 today so they should be ready in about 3 weeks. We have one other that will be pulled next week but that is all we got right now. We have orders for about 5 green Quakers and 3 blue Quakers. But we don't have any blue ones yet. It may takevl a while as they are adjusting from the move.
But so excited that dh can pay cs now.
I just got back from the doctor and just ingested my first dose of Prozac which I will need to be on for the next 6 months, minimum. I will also be eating mac-n-cheese for dinner which goes against my paleo diet in every way possible. But I could care less. I have thrown up everything I've eaten all day so I am going to eat something I know my body can handle right now.
So BM and I have been cheerful and chatty and pretending like I'm not also hearing about and assisting my DH with their less cheerful conversations.
I sent her this sweet letter that was in this month's issue of SM magazine from a SM to a BM with whom she doesn't have a good relationship but always wanted one. Told BM that it made me a little teary and I thought I'd share it with her.
She responds. "Why?"
So now I feel stupid. I'm sure she's somehow offended but I'm not sure why. Why do I even bother? Seriously, what the fuck is my deal?
I'm so stressed out, money is non-existant, bills are all behind, cs is not being paid, exfil has passed away leaving that whole side of the family now quarreling and exh is having a heck of a time keeping himself together let alone all the other craziness between exmil (his SM) and the aunts, uncles, and cousins. BM's lawyer is a moron and has set a court date for the "grounds hearing" but twice BM has been on the stand and given "grounds" of irreconcilable differences they've been separated 3-4 years now.
Some days they are playful towards me and want to help me cook and clean dishes especially the 7 year old twin boys but other times they are distance and only want to be around DH. If they get hurt they won't let me touch them they will push me away and cry for DH. sometimes they won't even let me hug them they just run and hug DH. With SD9 sometimes she will go shopping with me or brush my hair and other times she walk out of a room if I enter or she will make up stories to BM about how I committed some awful deed against her. I don't get it they are always lovely and playful with DH.
First of all for those that have noticed, sorry I have been MIA. I had family in from out of town and we had a big celebration for my grandfather this last weekend.... anyway
So BM asked if I would go along with her and DH to the endocrinologists for SD on Wednesday and I agreed. They are going to show us how to give SD her shot if her Addison's causes her to have an attack or if a serious injury were to happen. This ought to be fun...
Just an update and to give a little bit of hope for those dealing with BM's and SD's from hell. My SD does not live with us after suing us two years ago to live with mom. Still irritated by the way it was all handled, but it is not really a day to day issue anymore.
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