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To go or not to go?

Jenny79's picture

Submitted by Jenny79 on Tue, 07/16/2013 - 7:05am

Today DH took his 2 daughters age 12 and 10 on vacation for the week... And he would like for me and my dughter to join them. I am not sure I want to, friday night a huge fight broke out, he called me by the name of his XW and blame me for all his problems. The day after we talked, told him he has anger issues, drinking issues and that he needs to make peace with his past... He promised to get help if I spend a few days with him and his, bratty, spoiled fithy little white trash daughters...

SKids went back to BM yesterday, and guess who's playing buddy-buddy with DH

stepmom31's picture

Submitted by stepmom31 on Tue, 07/16/2013 - 6:05am

It really baffles me how these women just don't get it.

One civil interaction with DH regarding dropping off the kids, is all it takes for BM to start playing buddy-buddy with DH.

Doesn't she get that the SOLE reason he's even having a conversation with her is because of the kids?

BM keeps pushing a conversation with DH about people they know in common or things happening in the industry because she now works in the same industry as DH, and even works 5 minutes away from him.

How do I change my mindset?

Clovergirl's picture

Submitted by Clovergirl on Tue, 07/16/2013 - 12:35am

I guess now it all depends on if I can tolerate and being in the same room as BF's kids without feeling totally uncomfortable and awkward. Everyone here is telling me to leave him and yes, yes, many times I thought of leaving, but the idea of really walk out of the door is a bit overwhelming, it's not that easy to just walk. BF asked me not to hate him but I am not sure when it comes to the day I really walk out, will I be able not to hate him or blame him because he laid it all on me to determine the outcome? How do you all do it?

At what point

Aeron's picture

Submitted by Aeron on Mon, 07/15/2013 - 10:53pm

Is a parent's house no longer a kid's "home"?

I was reading and I've seen a lot of different opinions on people considering their parents houses still their home, on whether both houses of split parents are the kids' home and a lot of words indicating that a child shouldn't feel like a visitor in a parent's home regardless of how much or how little time the kid spends there.

So I'm just curious - at what point is it acceptable to treat a kid or a skid as a guest in house where one (or both come to that) parent lives?

Letter to BM (that I actually sent)

myspoonistoobig's picture

Submitted by myspoonistoobig on Mon, 07/15/2013 - 10:44pm

BM asked how we've been getting SS to skype with her, so I told her, and she seemed pretty upset. She didn't try and rip me a new one the way she would've if DH had told her, but she was very short after that.

So, I decided to send her an e-mail explaining why we'd chosen to do with skype time what we've done, and now I've posted it here for your viewing pleasure.

***********************************************
Dear BM,

i cant stop thinking

whichwhich's picture

Submitted by whichwhich on Mon, 07/15/2013 - 10:32pm

I am falling in love with someone else. I have been with bf for 6 years now. I have had enough. For the past two years we have been a little rocky. Now days it seems like every day is worse than the previous one. The worst part is that I have fallen in love with someone else. I love my current ss and I really like new guys son and daughter... I havn't been able to get to know them on a step motherish level yet but they are amazing kids. Things are complicated in every aspect and I need to vent and hopefully get advice.

why do i feel irritated?

purpledaisies's picture

Submitted by purpledaisies on Mon, 07/15/2013 - 7:44pm

When we dropped the boys off at home ss13 wanted dh to look at his gocart. It wasn't running right. Now its not that big of a deal and bm didn't come out til we were leaving. His boys are good kids.

But I feel that beinq at yuck house is so wrong. And I don't like the idea of dh helping them at her house.

O will let it go with out saying anything. But why do I feel this way?

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