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Wicked stepmo.'s Blog

In this episode of the Jerry Springer Show

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BM is currently losing her mind CPS is involved based on several reports of medical neglect for not following through with mental health services, medication management and trying to block intensive treatment services for both SDs. 

BM had been making sure SDs missed all Thier counseling appointments. SO when in home services got involved she took YSD for a visit and refused to bring her back to SO to meet with the workers to open the case. They rescheduled during SOs court ordered visitation time and BM intentionally kept YSD again.

Our own little support group.

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BMs ex BF and I talked on the phone for an hour yesterday. We shared stories of our experiences with feral spawn and BMs encouragement of their bad behavior.

BF had it much worse then me because I limited my interactions and communication with her as much as possible.

A good one was after YSD punched him in the face, BM defended YSD and accused BF if shoving YSD against the wall and throwing hot candle wax in her face. That's the night he kicked them out 

I heard BM on the phone with SO that night where she admitted YSD and OSD attacked him.

Validation

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Services start for SO this week. I was allowed to pick the behavior specialist. This is a woman who I hold in the highest regard, being one of the best at what she does.

We spoke yesterday because I know especially SO will not admit to his short comings as a parent or admit his role in the dysfunction. So I was more than happy to throw him under the bus. 

I told her how I felt and that I am emotionally drained and do not know if I can do this anymore or if having a relationship with SO is worth it to me anymore.

Not a step issue

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Now that I am not constantly distracted by daily dysfunctional chaos, I can get back to my regularly scheduled parenting.

Dear Neice is 20. Her mother was very abusive so she only had a normal childhood on her visitation days with me. When with BM she wasn't allowed to hang out with friends, get a job or anything. She was the live in babysitter for her younger sisters.

She works 35 hours a week and goes to school full time. She does clean up around the house and does her own laundry. 

Perspectives on this

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I wish I knew what exactly SO is thinking. I have been nothing but honest with him and very clear about my boundaries.

From the minute we discussed them moving out I have said I have no plan or timeline for this situation to change. I have agreed to participate in counseling with SO and YSD and will focus on our relationships one day at time. 

So I am very confused by SOs behavior. He is in complete suck up mode like he can fix the problems we have by trying harder. If I believed he was only focusing on fixing our relationship it would be a step in the right direction.

The beginning stage of healing.

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I no longer feel the intense stress I had been feeling every day. But I became so used to the constant chaos that I still am irrationally anxious all the time fearing something crazy will happen even though I know that SKs are gone and not coming back. 

I have become less moody and withdrawn. Yesterday was the first time since I can remember sitting in my own living room and watching a movie. 

Normally I would sit out in the living room for maybe 20 min and would quietly leave due to the aggravation and go to my room for some solitude and to try and relax before bed. 

You can't make this stuff up

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So I get home from work. SO isn't there but started packing and had to run out for a bit.

YSD has not packed a thing and is in the kitchen making a small buffet. I walk in and she immediately starts with her disrespectful mouth. I tell her to get her things because she is leaving today. I do not have to tolerate her behavior and I will not tolerate her behavior in my house. I told her she is starting to act just like her sister and it's a shame she doesn't learn from her sisters mistakes.

Wake up call

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Yesterday YSD proceeded to be her mouthy disrespectful self. This time she kept telling DS he was dumb every time he did something. This was repeatedly and intentionally mean and she is well aware DS is dyslexic and insecure about it. He has to work twice as hard as other kids to maintain good grades.

I told her someone with a zero average shouldn't be calling other people dumb. 

How YSD completely turned on me.

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January 29th midnight BM drops both OSD and YSD at our doorstep and takes off. They both proceeded to assault mom's boyfriend and not only did he kick them out he got OOP against them. Kudos to BMs boyfriend!

OSD left after 2 days to begin her house hopping adventure where everyone learned first hand that OSD is not the victim she portrays herself to be.

YSD began to act out verbally attacking me and SO for even looking in her direction. So I stopped speaking to her completely. So then she moved on to sending a barrage of texts things like:

Christmas blow up

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SD came for her bday in May. Then she came again for SOs bday in August. I remained disgusted with the both of them so I voluntarily went away with DS because I didn't want anything to do with it.

SD stated four days in which SO took her out to eat and shopping for clothes each day she was there. SO posted pics on FB like they were a loving father and daughter.  I'm the fourth day when SO told her he didn't have the money to spend. SD made her exit. 

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