Aniki-Moderator's Blog
OT quick answer: my Mother was 'stepmom' to MANY
I had an unusual Mother. She was a rebel when it wasn't COOL for a woman to be a rebel. She secretly climbed trees my grandfather was logging to she could "ride 'em down". She joined the Air Force when women who joined were all considered to be lesbians. The AF is where she met my Dad, they married, she became a housewife and mother, and they had 5 pretty darn awesome kids!
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Thankful it's over for another year
I made it through Christmas with the help of my buddy, Di Saronno.
DH and I were up late Christmas Eve cleaning house and cooking. The skids were due to arrive Christmas day at 1pm, so our plan was to get up at 9am, finish cleaning/cooking, and get a shower.
BioHo called at 10am to...find out what time the skids were supposed to get there. WTF?!?!?!?!?! EVERY SINGLE ONE of those shi'theads were told ONE FREAKING PM. Annoyed the living FiretrUCK out of me. So.....
I was bad.
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I'm ready for it to be December 26th
I just want Christmas to be OVER. We didn't put up any decorations this year. DH has been working overtime 3 out of 4 weekends every month. He's exhausted. I'm still in PT for my shoulder (surgery). I'm tired and sore. Both of us got sick last weekend and are still not 100%. This skids and my MIL are all coming over Christmas day. We're having food. We have PLENTY of Christmas presents for the skids to open. Is that good enough? Apparently NOT.
PigPen13 whined to BioHo that Daddeeeeee "cancelled Christmas". Huh?? Just because we didn't put up a facking TREE?? So BioHo calls DH.
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OT - the evils of Ouija
Echo, you asked for it.
Incident #1 - 38 years ago
My oldest sister used to have a Ouija board. Since she and my other sister (also older) used to cheat on the Mystery Date game so I always got The Dud, I figured they were cheating with the Ouija, moving the planchette themselves, to make it say what they wanted. So...one night when they and my brothers were out, I got out the Ouija board and tried it out. The planchette moved all by itself and spelled out D-I-E. The next day, my parents rushed me to the ER where my appendix burst and they barely got it out in time.
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Back from vacation; surgery in 13 days
I'm baaaaaack! Vacation was absolutely FABULOUS!! Fisherman's Wharf, Golden Gate Bridge, Yosemite (wow!!!), Lake Tahoe, Salt Lake in Utah, Devils Tower, Mount Rushmore... Not to forget the wine tasting. All of that wine... We got out of CA with 3 CASES of wine. I'm so tired of tasting wine, not sure when I'll be able to drink another glass. Came home to the surgery packet from the doctor...and promptly freaked out because my EKG was abnormal and (according to my sister) scared I'm going to die on the operating table. (That means part of your heart could be blocked!
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PigPen - who is TWELVE - stole BioHo's car
I wish I was making this sh!t up...
We are sitting at home Friday, waiting for the skids usual call that BioHo is driving them to our house. 'Ho calls to say they'll be late. Why? Because PigPen has to go see a psychiatrist. WTF? PigPen gets on the phone to explain...
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oh FFS
PigPen (who is not DH's son) is not happy at BioHo's house. Well...sorry and too bad. It's not like PigPen can move in with DH (and me). Then is NO way in Hades 'Ho is about to pay CS to DH!!! I need a drink.
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O/T: imagining a band called BioHo and the Skids... what would yours be like?
BioHo and the Skids. Hmmm...
BioHo (thinking worse than a drunk Courtney Love from Hole): I'm picturing a drunk, badly bleach blonde, lipstick-smeared, dressed in a barely-there ripped mini dress that's about to split from squeezing her busted can o' biscuits (that's a muffin top gone wild), staggering around on her chunky high-heeled sandals (cuz nothing that size can balance on stilettos), singing into a wine bottle that she thinks is a microphone as she has forgotten she's wearing a headset mike.
oh yes, I'm mean, Mean, MEAN!
BioHo called DH on Sunday to pitch a hissy fit that I have not accepted PigPen12's FakeBook friend request. Then her phone apparently died before he could respond (she called back a few minutes later on SD18's phone). I have NO idea why, but I was immediately incensed and went from zero to bitch INSTANTLY and said...
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Aniki's Flying Five Fist Monkey Nut Punch
Aniki's Flying Five Fist Monkey Nut Punch 2 oz Godiva chocolate liqueur 2 oz Kahlua 1 oz Bailey's Irish Cream 1 oz Frangelico 1 oz Sea Salt Caramel vodka OR Toasted Caramel Whisky 1 sli Banana 1 pt Chocolate ice cream Combine Godiva, Kahula, Bailey's, Frangelico, vodka, banana and ice cream in a blender. Blend until smooth. Split mixture between glasses. Garnish with whipped cream and a plastic cocktail monkey.