I have deleted many of my older blogs, as I am paranoid that information will get pieced together, ect, ect - so some brief (as I can be) history. I've been with FDH for two years now. We have had issues with FSD13 (was 11 at the time) from the start. FDH and BM were never together - FSD had a possible three dads and carrys BM last night. FSD has a history of chasing off two other women.

Well I have moved to a new job and that has been really good. The people are great and I was going to be moving into new territory and promoting into something new....until my dad had a massive heart attack. We are very lucky he is still here with us, but he has a long road of recovery ahead of him and I chose to opt for the easier job that will allow me alot more freedom and time off if need be. Not ideal, but at the same time I realize for me that the job is just that and I would rather have more freedom to be with my dad.

Things have been very strange around my house. Over the weekend, my husband became very angry with me. I was not doing the work he wanted me to do. (I did a lot of work in the garden and inside the house, but he wanted me to do things from his list, and to get directions from him before doing those things.) One night, he began shouting at me, saying he cannot live with me anymore, and that I am horrible, and he has no idea how I have lived this long being as horrible as I am. I told him he is welcome to leave if that is what he wants.

I am so happy I found this blog this morning! I am about to scream! 

I have been with my SO for 3 years... maybe 3 years too long. He has 2 daughters 11 & 13. He thinks that their shit doesn’t stink. He talks to them in a voice like you would talk to a 10 month old baby. When my children are home with us he rarely conversates with my kids, doesn’t play any games with them... nothing!  I go above and beyond for his kids and he does nothing for mine. 

His friend told me that we would be ok if it wasn’t for my kids. 

After 2.7years in Grade 2, Chucky is finally grasping division and multiplication basics. DH is over the moon. I have to admit my lovelies if I rolled my eyes any harder I would be looking at the back of my skull.

My MIL brought SD22 home this evening and marched right up to us questioning if I was going to be driving her to work when she starts her new job because it's going to cost so much for her to pay for cabs/lyfts. I yet again pointed out how she refused to help around the house and that was the rule for me driving grown kids around. She said, "Well that's shitty." and SO LOST HIS SHIT. They yelled back and forth, mil saying stuff like dh treats sd22 like shit and she knew it would turn out like this and dh told her to leave and not ever come back.

A list of things that make stepparenting difficult would go on and on. I've struggled with several issues myself. However, the one thing that seems to be most difficult for me is letting go. I'm not talking about disengaging- I'm simply talking about letting go of the extra stresses that come with the deal of taking on a child that isn't your own.

Ahhh... summer. Nice hot days, gorgeous warm nights. You plan on relaxing in your home in the AC or go out and enjoy life with your DH. Then DH gets a call from BM that says the 3 skids need to be picked up at the airport because they are spending the summer with their dad! DH was never notified of these plans but BM took it upon herself to book flights and send them to their dad for the summer. I was in a state of horror. We live in a small one bedroom apartment and when they are here I feel put out of my own home which I pay for most of the rent.

I have been reading comments and blogs on this site for a while and I finally felt like it might make me feel better to post and vent. 

My husband and I just had our first marriage anniversary. We have an 11 month old boy together, I have a 5 year old girl, and he has a 3 year old son. The first thing I want to say, is that I love my husband and he is a good dad. I don’t want to belittle him by complaining about these things, because he tries. He’s just... a man. 

The title isn't misleading...this may end up being my last post. I've only been an official member of this site for over a month, since someone recommended I use this platform to discuss my struggles and to gain support. I'm already questioning if I want to continue voicing my experiences and frustrations. If anyone looks back at my past posts, you will begin to see a pattern in the comments.