Hey, I am new here. I am officially going to be a step parent in less than a week, but my fiancé and I have been living together with his daughter (who is now 7) for 4 years. She is here 50% of the time and a joy to have around.

My step daughter has off school tomorrow. 

Her before and after works as a regular daycare if school is out. 

Me: “‘maybe you should have her go to the daycare thing, tomorrow”

DH: “why?” 

Me: “because I think the baby is getting sick and cries most the day it will be more for me to have to worry about” 

DH: “ what just cereal thats not hard..” 

Me: “you dont even ask me you just spring this stuff on me” 

DH: “we are married” 

DH: “what do you think (ex wife’s husband) would say if she asked( her husband) to watch (SD) 

I'm present in their lives. I inject myself in their lives .They talk to their mom and to each other. They rush in to our room in the morning and tell her good morning and completely ignore me . Bed time is the same. 

I can call step kids on their cells and they ignore it. They have memorized their moms and dads and grandparents cell phones yet I'm an active step dad.

If I play with them eg hide their ball all in good fun so we can find it, they run to mom crying and she says not to do it as the kids don't like it. 

One of DH's uncles (FIL's brother) passed away unexpectedly earlier this week. The service was today, and MIL decided to join (mind you, she and FIL have been divorced for 15+ years but still act *somewhat* married...it's odd).

Anyway, kids are with us, and she must have been talking to them about school because, out of nowhere and interrupting DH in a conversation with one of his aunts, she starts poking DH in the arm trying to get his attention.

So, I guess I can vent h ere about this.  Today's my birthday.  As usual my Husband is out of town... in fact working where he doesn't even have much cell signal today.  He has had to be gone on my birthday for years.  On top of that, he is not a great gift planner.. and we have had some tight financial times so lots of years there just wasn't money to buy much.. and even if we did have money... he just sucks at buying gifts.  He is like this with everyone, I buy all the gifts for his family too..haha.

Last week, I put my first blog out here and the advice and support I received was amazing. In brief, my SD20 came to live with myself and DH about 9 months ago.  She did not like living with BM and had the convenience that my home (my home before I married DH), was 5 minutes from SD20's boyfrends house. SD20 got rude and disrespectful to me last week and I said she was no longer welcome - she did not keep room clean, paid no rent, ate food without paying for any of it, did not keep her bathroom clean and did as she pleased.

(I know I already posted today but this has been on going and SO just texted me because he’s frustrated.)

I was talking to my mom the other day about everything. To an outsider it would look like things are getting better but really it’s that BM is using us. Given we’re allowing it because it means we’re getting more time with the kids and all that but it’s clear it’s all about being convenient for her and not what’s best for the kids and I have “evidence.”

We finally got SS14's medical records from his primary. The office manager there used to coach SS and was not happy to hear that BM was acting like such a horrible B. We told her that we had been trying to find out who SS's doctor was for years and BM refused to tell us. We also told her about the false reports she made at the school on SS's IEP. She talked us through all kinds of things and then let us know that a referral had been sent out to a hospital for an Elhors-Danlos consult.

Well some of my fellow stalkers are going to be proud of me for this one. Looks like my "crazy" pregnancy hormones are kicking in and making it a little more difficult for me to control the things that come flying out of my mouth..... Especially at my noise MIL. 

Yesterday evening my FIL needed to borrow something from DH but he doesn't like to drive close to dark. My MIL was out doing something already so he asked her to swing by and collect the item. Ok no problem. DH was home so I figured he would handle her and she would be on her way. (Wishful thinking)

not sure how to deal with this issue...yes I have disengaged for the most part but some issues still creep in.    My issue deals with my YSS11 and his cell phone.   YSS is a pretty good kid and he and I get along much better than I ever did with OSS or MSS (who we never see anymore).   YSS isn’t exactly the issue or even the cell phone.  But how the phone is used is what eats at me.