If you've followed along with my story, you know SS12 comes for a total of 4 weeks in the summer. It is supposed to be in 2 two week blocks but per our stupid CO, BM can break that down into whatever increments is needed for "sport related conflicts" as long as we maintain 4 weeks/30 days total. Oh and the CO gives BM up to one week before SS is scheduled to arrive (day after the last day of school) to make any changes. 

My stepson is 9 and VERY immature.  We took him to te park last night and he held his mom's hand the whole way there and back.  I find it looks off.  He is up to her shoulder in height and it looks wromg to me.  He is nearing the end of Grade 4.  I teach at the middle school he will be going to in Grade 7 and I feel like the other kids wont accept him at alll.  He is at a traditional school nowwhere the kids are nicer but he never sees kids outsids of school.  I feel like my wife only carrs about making him feel loved and not about veing an independemt person witb a life outsde of his immed

I took a (tiny) break on here and now I'm back. I was feeling a lot of stress and anxiety over my husbands ex and my own ex.

My husband was calling me on my chemo day over anxiety with nasty messages bio moms sending him. I ended up having anxiety attacks and essentially "freeze mode" from feeling so much stress. I had to tell him I won't discuss this.

Now.. My daughter (17) has her driver's license. My ex husband bought a car essentially for their use. A small beater car. He already had a brand new giant truck he drives.

For my own sanity and stress level, I'm working on not caring regarding SS13. In other words, if it's an issue that doesn't directly impact me, my property or the dogs, I'm going to stop caring or worrying about it. Just let go and let the parents deal with it (or not -- as will probably be the case). I feel like I've been caring too much and getting too anxious about certain things, but that just leads to frustration as there's not much I can do.

Todays active shooter event in Las Vegas was in my DW's office bldg. It occurred on a different floor than where she works.

The event killed a lawyer, and his new wife who he was representing during a deposition. Apparently the shooter who also killed himself, was also a lawyer, and the XFIL of the murdered wife.  The XFIL was representing his son.  Reports are that the XH/son of the shooter was in the deposition.  The dead couple recently had a baby.  The victim lawyer is a father of 4.

Lillywy00 Wrote:

I'd rather be involved behind the scenes because these jealous breeders raise hell simply seeing the new wife's name on anything, so as long as they think everything is the dad's idea, then it's smoother sailing.

https://www.steptalk.org/blog/wineoclock/should-step-parents-be-included...

So instead of just the weekend YSD18 is here "for a few extra days" DH tells me yesterday, Sunday, afternoon. I'm sure he knew about it before but didn't want to tell me. Ok, whatever - just so you know DH, I'm cooking meat for dinner tonight I had planned and we are out of veg so you'll need to go get more today.

After a pleasant week off, SS13 came back over yesterday. As usual, the unbearable stench hit us when he got in the car. (He always comes over from BM's absolutely reeking of pet-related smells. It's not BO.) DH had to open the sunroof and roll down windows until we got home. When we arrived home, DH told him to go up and shower and to bring his clothes down to the washer. He got the bag of sports uniforms and dumped them straight in there as well.

I go on prepping lunch. Eventually, SS comes down -- wearing the same tracksuit he was wearing before.

We are trialling out a co-parenting app as an official line of communication. It means that we can have shared calendars, messages can't be deleted and we can keep a record of call logs to the kids. The co-parenting app has an option of including third parties such as grandparents and step parents so that everyone is on the same page with matters to do with the kids. 
 

Is it a good idea to be part of this co-parenting app or is it best for it to be kept just between the bio parents? 

I successfully did the ‘Medium Chill’ at dinner tonight.  Medium Chill is A technique used to disengage oneself from another person's drama when direct contact is unavoidable.

Medium Chill is disengaging emotionally and giving neutral responses to what someone does or says. The focus is on you, your feelings and needs, not the other person or their feelings and needs.