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MIL and her knack for ruining a step christmas

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Sat, 12/11/2021 - 6:48pm

So, MIL again makes her attempt at Christmas plans that totally ignore anything about our schedule or DH's time with skids. She even includes Skids on the text when she tells everyone that she will take them to the family cabin on DH's next weekend (we can't go because DH has a work meeting on Saturday and then we fly out Monday morning) without saying anything to DH about it first.

Already over Thanksgiving

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Wed, 11/24/2021 - 1:59am

In early October, one SS called DH to ask if he could go to California to spend Thanksgiving with his grandparents, even though it's his year to be with DH. In response, DH sends a message to BM via OFW saying, "SS asked me if he could go to California for Thanksgiving. Please confirm." BM sends 9 paragraphs in response about how it was just SS's idea and she doesn't even know if her parents will be in California...and on and on and on about nothing.

BM ignores the agreement and SS is the next Tiger Woods

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Fri, 09/24/2021 - 1:42am

Tonight, SS calls DH and asks if he can pick them up tomorrow for visitation weekend. If anyone has read my past blogs, they know that BM is supposed to drive SSs to our house on the Friday of visitation weekends, but always has some excuse as to why she can't or some reason why she thinks DH should pick them up. With all this in mind, DH tells SS, "I can't, but your mother can just bring you by later." SS replies that she can't because she left for Mexico that morning.

Do kids ever see HCBM as the problem?

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Sun, 08/29/2021 - 9:38am

So, if you read my last blog you know that BM tried to stir up drama about DH taking the kids driving. Fast forward to this weekend and one Skid shows up and says to DH, "aren't you going to take us driving, Dad? That's part of parenting, Dad!" And he kept going on and on until DH got mad at him. Later, DH talked to both skids. He told them that their mother did not dictate what goes on in our house, that it wasn't any of her business what went on in our house, and he was sick of both of them causing drama by reporting everything back to BM.

Skids apparently have a right to drive my car

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Mon, 08/16/2021 - 11:47pm

Today, BM sends DH an email via OFW. 
 

"You told me you would teach the boys how to drive. They are now telling me that your wife is refusing to allow it. They have just started drivers ed and the school says they need to get as much practice as possible. Please confirm with me that this is true."

BM-speak - “co-parenting” = do whatever I demand

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Thu, 08/12/2021 - 4:25pm

If you have read any of my other blogs, you know that BM regularly tries to get out of dropping skids off on visition weekends (which is her one obligation under the CO). Now that she has a boyfriend (soon to be husband #3?), she has doubled-down on getting out of this requirement.

Yesterday, she texts DH and says, "can we switch pick up and drop off this weekend?" DH replies, "I can't, but it's fine if you drop them off later." This should address BM's issue because she always claims she can't get out of work on time to get skids to our house by 6pm. 
 

Ugh - MIL and guilt trips

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Fri, 07/16/2021 - 6:26pm

So, DH hasn't seen SSs since June becuse first BM planned her vacation over his weekend and then when they returned from that, MIL whisked them off for two weeks with her. 

Today, MIL texts DH and says, "overly dramatic SS says he hasn't seen you in over a month. You need to plan a special outing with them when they get home." Why does everything always have to be a "special outing"? Also, why does DH have to make up for BM and MIL's penchant for scheduling over DH's time?

Freedom! Won’t be seeing SSs for over a month!

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Wed, 06/23/2021 - 7:40pm

One benefit of both BM and MIL being completely self-centered and inconsiderate is that SSs will not be back at our home until July 31st. First, BM scheduled her vacation over DH's weekend without telling him...she still hasn't told him they won't be coming to our house, just put the dates on OFW (this was after making a big stink earlier in the year about how she always reviews OFW and schedules around DH's weekend, when she wanted DH to take her weekend). Then MIL insisted upon taking SSs on a two week vacation to Kentucky? Ohio? New York?

BM asks the same question for the millionth time

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Thu, 06/03/2021 - 12:41am

Visitation weekend is near and what does that mean? BM will be contacting DH, yet again, to switch pick up and drop off with DH. She usually has some excuse about the need to work late, saying something "terrible" and last minute has come up and it will be really difficult to convince "her boss" to let her leave before a certain time on Friday evening (um, she's the boss at work...she's a partner, she doesn't report to anyone). DH replies and says, "it's fine for the kids to come later." She replies and says, "but it won't be until 11pm" or something like that.

Three years left - the countdown begins

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Submitted by strugglingSM on Thu, 05/27/2021 - 3:59pm

As of today, we now have three years...36 months...left of CS. Yes, DH will likely have to pay some postsecondary support, but in our state, it appears as though that will be limited to covering educational expenses and can be paid directly to whatever institution SSs might attend. I'm betting that neither will actually attend anywhere because they don't really like school and without money flowing directly to her, BM will not have an incentive. According to state law, other child support appears to be advisory, not mandatory. 

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