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Would you?

lovetoteach's picture

Some times I wonder if I could go back in time and decide to not move forward in a serious relationship w a man who shares a child w another woman, would I? I was only 22 at the time.. but our chemistry was so palpable it was a whirlwind first month of dating. Love came quickly and easily. I had no idea what was in my (4yr) future, didn't have online resources for help, certainly had no friends w experiences. 
 

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When do you give up?

lovetoteach's picture

I'm so tired....

ive been with my bf for 4 years and I'm at the point where I'm ready for marriage. His SS and I have the best relationship and he loves me dearly. Although I will never like the way he was conceived (1 night stand) we're still amicable and have a good schedule w his bio mother. 
 

Bf is nearing 30 and I'm in my mid 20s. He thinks the issue lies w financial aspects but I just don't understand that bc nothing much would change. 

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When do you give up?

lovetoteach's picture

I'm so tired....

ive been with my bf for 4 years and I'm at the point where I'm ready for marriage. His SS and I have the best relationship and he loves me dearly. Although I will never like the way he was conceived (1 night stand) we're still amicable and have a good schedule w his bio mother. 
 

Bf is nearing 30 and I'm in my mid 20s. He thinks the issue lies w financial aspects but I just don't understand that bc nothing much would change. 

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Ugh...BM being stupid DH too

Maria10's picture

This has been an ongoing thing with SS13. He does not want to read anything and keeps coming up with excuses and manipulations ao that he doesn't have to study/ read. He did getdiagnosed with a reading disability and had an Iep in grade 5( he will be in grade 9 this fall). Do not know the status of that iep or anything.( I doubt BM got off her ass to go get it reevaluated since 5th grade).

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BM cannot stand our happy home

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

EOW visits with SD13 have been going really well. There is no Disney Dad happening. No nightly phone calls to BM. SD13 seems pretty happy when she is here. She spends time with us by her own choice and we all get along well. When it is time to go back to BM’s (who she chose to stay with FT) she drags her feet. 

I am still sticking to my two rules. I am not left alone with SD13 because of her lying. And I keep conversation focused on her, so my invisible emotional boundary is intact. 

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I did something dumb

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

I looked at BM’s fb and got a stomach ache over all of the lies. She paints this rosy picture of her life and who she is. All of it is absolute bullcrap.

DH was disappointed in me for “diving into the muck” and giving her power over my mind. He chooses to ignore her. He is wise.

 

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The Way BM’s word things...

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

 It is as though she is the CEO of divorced moms everywhere. Every sentence has too many damn adverbs. They ooze drama that is “professional sounding” in the way those scam emails that pretend to alert you to an unauthorized user logging into your Apple iTunes account are. You know what I mean, Steppers? Please comment with examples so I can laugh. Ten more years. Ten more years of this psychopath. I saw her the other day. Geez does she look like dried dog poop flakes so gracefully ironic in the wind.

DH gets weekly Emails with these phrases:

Just a friendly reminder..

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Treating the BM Like A Disease My DH Will Always Have

Forthelifeoftheparty's picture

This morning I’ve been reading about Narcissistic Personality Disorder from a narcissist’s point of view on Quora. Interesting stuff.

I’m pretty sure BM has NPD based on her actions, opinions of people who have known her for decades, and oh yeah, that little golden psyche report which came back “inconclusive” during the divorce. 

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