You are here

New_to_this's Blog

I can't move on from even the smallest frustrations

New_to_this's picture

I feel so emotionally stuck. All of the crap that SS15 has done in the years that I've been in my relationship with DH just weighs on me. It's not just him, it's all the BM crap too, but BM gets to insert herself in our lives because of SS, so I blame him. And, of course, DH allows SS's shenanigans and uselessless and doesn't enforce boundaries with BM, so really my problems are with DH.

Feeling calm rather than stressed

New_to_this's picture

I'm calmer than I've been in a while. After the last of SS15's shenanigans, I told DH that I couldn't do this anymore. I won't get into all of it. I just knew that I was done. A few week before, DH told me that BM had done internet searches into boarding schools. Knowing that BM was looking to put SS in a boarding school, I realized that I couldn't count on any hope that she would ever take SS full-time. She would dump him on us even though we have too much to handle as it as (2 little kids).

Being held hostage

New_to_this's picture

That’s how DH described our situation. We are being held hostage by SS15, an emotionally manipulative, mentally troubled teen.

This is the fault of DH and his ex. SS has been emotionally manipulative since I met him when he was 8 years old. A part of it is genetic and an early learned behavior by SS, but DH and his ex could have parented him differently. They could’ve given real consequences for his actions. They could’ve been honest with him about how his behavior affects himself and everyone around him.

DH supporting SS's delusions

New_to_this's picture

Ok, so maybe calling SS delusional is strong, but this kid seriously has no self-awareness. So, in more attempts to waste our time and money, he told DH that he wanted to become a lifeguard and work at a local pool this summer. He said he found a job listing on a website for 15 year olds and he will be turning 15 soon. He told DH this earlier this week and DH was totally supportive of this.

Holiday cards. Am I wrong?

New_to_this's picture

I'm not one that sends out cards for the holidays. It's not something that I grew up with, so it feels a little weird to me, even though DH and I get plenty of cards from others, especially the cards with a photo of the kids, the family, or the dog. This year was the first year that I bought professional pictures from DS3's class pictures. He's never had professional pictures taken before, which is another thing I'm not so happy about, but that'll be for another rant.

DH and his memory

New_to_this's picture

Obviously SS is going to do sh*tty things everytime he's here, so this is just a recap of the most annoying thing this weekend thus far. DH, DS, and I went out in the morning for less than two hours. Within that time, SS woke up, ate breakfast and lunch, made a mess, and went into the pantry (he's not allowed in there) and took either two or three of DS's juice boxes.

Why does it just keep getting worse

New_to_this's picture

Three months full-time.

Yep. I just found out that SS14 will be with us for three months. And, this will start either days before or after I give birth. We currently have him every other week and I'm totally sick of him by mid-week. I'm already on the brink of losing my mind with DH due to my hormones and DH spending all his time and money on SS.

Skids will get a "real" Christmas, like every year

New_to_this's picture

I'm rolling my eyes. But, at least I don't have to spend Christmas with SS14 for once!

We take the skids every single year for the Christmas week even though the custody agreement says they are supposed to alternate yearly. So for 8 years, we've gone to DH's parent's house for the week with the skids.