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Alienation has begun

Frazzled2020's picture

I'm hoping I can get some advice on how as a SM and my DH should proceed. 
my SD13 has been showing signs of alienation for almost 2 years now. We would go to SS9 ball game and SD would come say hi to us and watch the game with us..then on the skids visit SD would tell us that BM got mad at SD etc. 

It’s official

Frazzled2020's picture

After our chaotic weekend with BM doing whatever she can to disrupt our time away with the skids, DH and I talked extensively about the future with the skids and BM. 
we discussed the "try harder" or "back off" approach. 
DH has been trying harder than he use to but he has been following the mediated agreement from 2 years ago, that BM doesn't. 

DH is starting to give up

Frazzled2020's picture

It's been 2 years of waiting to see a judge. 
we have had many mediations and BM never gives anything. 
 

DH has noticed that SD has gotten worse since court started. We never told the skids and even have an agreement that says not to. Of course BM accidentally let SD know. Ever since then, SD has seemed to of gotten worse. 
 

DH is tired of waiting. The lawyer seems like a waste of money. 
BM argues about everything. She even plans on moving states. (We dont when it where) 

Damaging SD

Frazzled2020's picture

Hello, 

my other blogs explain the issues with the SD and the BM that is awful but I wanted some fellow parents advice please and thank you. 
 

DR told us that all books regarding "depression, death, suicide, bullying, cutting" and tv shows be taken away from SD. 
 

we purchased SD many books for Christmas (before knowing this) one of which is PaperTowns by John Green. This book was taken by BM and is now in her house in a "safe" and she refuses to give back any of our property. 
 

Is bm wrong

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So this is the update. 
DH and BM just agreed that they each had to tell each other 96hours before they left town with the kids, the addresses of where the kids would be staying and an itinerary 

We came to the town BM and DH are from with the SC. 
BM sent an email last night saying "text or call me when you get there" 

DH wasn't going to. SD has a cell and they call BM Sat @ 6 (we have them 48 hours) 

so BM texted DH this morning asking if they made it (aggressively and argumentatively) 

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BM drama

Frazzled2020's picture

Gist. 
There is a mediated agreement that states that DH and BM are to only communicate via email unless an emergency. 
BM texted two weeks ago when SD left her phone at our house (DH didn't respond via text) 

BM just texted now. DH doesn't plan on responding

DH has texted BM once to discuss phone call time change and she sent an extensive email about that Wasnt per the mediated agreement. 
I don't understand how rules don't apply to BM. And yes of course DH will just email her on Sunday night and say for her to follow proocal (which she doesn't do) 

Medical Bill. Help!

Frazzled2020's picture

DH has a mediation paper that says he has 30 days to pay dr upon receipt of bill or 30 days to pay BM upon proof of payment. 
for two years now she has only shown receipts of paid bills. 
DH has informed lawyer who says we will discuss it in court (date keeps moving) 

we just received a paid bill today from bm showing a 2k bill that DH has to pay BM in 30 days from a personal check

we don't have 2k. We need to be able to pay dr with credit card just as bm can

any advice on what to do? 

there is no way we will get 2k in 30 days 

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