Well, I'll try to summarize this situation as best I can.
BM moved SD10 to Georgia with her about 4 years ago so that she could be with her middle school sweetheart. She also moved her other son, from a different dad who was only 2 at the time. Even though both dads were actively involved in both kids lives. (selfish much?)
Seriously...ever have those times when you want to run away screaming from the whole situation. I mean, what did I do to deserve this? WHY do I have to deal with a woman that I didn't pick?
BM lives in GA, us in TX. She moved to GA to be with her middle school sweetheart. Whatever. Just got a letter in the mail on Friday that she is taking us back to court for more child support. YAY!
So, BM pays for insurance for SD8. In our plan, it says that we are to split all costs outside of insurance 50/50 and the paying parent must send proof of payment to the other payment within 90 days.
Welll...BM decided to wait until now to tell us about $300 of bills that have been piling up. She does not have anything to give us besides the EOB from her insurance. Well, I am NOT sending BM money through the mail...who knows what she would say happened to it. We asked her to set up a paypal and she refuses.
Well, I left my FDH.
To be honest, it was fairly peaceful. I guess both of us were lacking in motivation to keep it going. So here am, stuff in my car, on my friends couch, trying to plan the next step of my life.
I'm only 24, I have a long life ahead of me and I know I'll find someone else.
FDH was the one man that I gave up everything for, and now I have to take it all back.
On the bright side, goooooooodbye BM!
Any encouraging words would be helpful as heartache is never any fun.
Honestly, my situation isn't bad. We only have SD7 on holidays and during summer break because BM moved her away. It sucks, but at the same time, it got BM far away from us..
But you know those days where you just drive yourself mad with thoughts of BM?! I think it is especially bad when you don't have children of your own. I want so badly to be a mom, so it's hurtful when the only somewhat child I have, I am not a mother too. So you have times where you just dwell on them and it and the whole situation.
It's enough to make a girl mad.
So. I officially decided to disengage from the BM. It is not my battle to fight, and I honestly drive myself nuts to fight it. It's only been a week and already I feel great!
Any of you who have read my blogs, know that I am SM to SD7 who recently moved to live with her mom in Georgia. Yes, FH and I agreed to this arrangement because we are both young, and still in school and knew that we would barely have a fighting chance in court, as with many times before.
We made the arrangement pretty much exactly as we wanted.
-no child support
-we have her the entire summer, christmas break and every other spring break
-we can visit her for 7 days out of every month
So BM has SD7 on her birthday in January. We live over 3000 miles away, so it is not always possible to see her.
She does however come to us for the whole summer and spring/christmas breaks.
I was thinking about making a 1/2 birthday celebration for her in July because she has a lot of family and friends out here, plus I think it would be fun. It doesn't necessarily have to be advertised as her birthday, but just a fun party we do for her.
What do you guys think?
I mean, I seriously am having a harder time dealing with this woman than I do BM. She will not get off our back about everything, she basically thinks that she is SD's mom. It is so awkward.
When we allowed SD to move with BM because it was a good, positive, healthy thing to do. She freaked out. It has been almost a year and she still mentions it almost daily, cries about it all the time and acts so immature it is unbelievable.
Lately, custody, child support and step kids are weighing on me so heavily. I go back and forth about fighting for our SD and just letting her live with her mom. But I guess I've realized that at the end of the day, my SO and I are very happy. He had a kid very young, and never really had a chance to grow up. Having SD every weekend like we did before caused a lot of stress and tension in our relationship. We now have SD on Spring, Christmas and all of Summer breaks...it is so much better, for everyone involved.