I do not think I have been this happy since my 3yo was born (and immediately ruined by BM who conveniently filed custody papers for us to receive while I was in hospital). SD18 tomorrow is completely packed and moving out tomorrow, I hope never to return to our house. No more drama, no more manipulation, NO MORE BM!!!!!! SD seriously has some issues, and definitely been PAS'ed to the point that EVERYTHING is DH fault by her passive aggressive BM, passive aggressive BF and passive aggressive BF mom that she is so unbearable.
YSD was actually thinking of staying here past graduation---no no no no no. I had agreed to let her stay til she graduates as the responsibility is there in both DH and me to do so. Yet she tells DH last night that she has been thinking about staying here til fall (yet has no plans to go to college).
Been a while since I have been here. Totally had disengaged until last week, when I couldn't help myself----and this happened with only a couple more weeks when my YSD turns 18. She put a "F*** War" bumper sticker on her car. I yanked it off---I mean come on, I have three kids under 10 still in the house, who don't need to read that stuff. I am all for freedom of speech, but you don't have to be vulgar to get your point across.
DH didn't think I should have reacted so quickely. Oh well, the deed was done.
if we continue to disengage? Have been disengaged from SD17 for a few years now, even though DH is PC and she is with us 85% of time. Saw it in DH eyes the other night that he is starting to disengage from my BS16 and it hurt to see that, since he has been only real dad to BS for over 1/2 his life. Any others have to deal with this and possible fall out? Will DH resent, and I resent the other as they don't get excited over happy events w/bios?
BM had in her head that when SD turns 18, can get her to move there, and then collect CS. BM has been pushing SD to move there, and even offered to "split" the CS w/her. BM thought she could collect support until 21, while SD in school. BM even called CS to see.
DH told BM last week to back off, that SD needs to focus on finishing school. That the most CS she would get would be for 2, maybe 3 months based on NC laws---that she would spend all that money on lawyer fees, and $$ would got to SD anyway. BM didn't believe him. She called CS AGAIN
SD17 will be 18 end of March. For sometime now, she (me too) has been counting down the days, as SD insists she will move in w/BM----DH has been PC forever now. Fine, we will help you move. DH has been trying to convince SD to at least wait to graduate in June, as past experience has shown that BM could care less if she does. Found out today that BM has been telling SD---I will give you all of the CS of $500 if you move in with me. And we can collect it until you are 25. ----- Oh MY!!! So many lies in these promises, it is unbelievable.
Could see it coming a mile away. Got nasty call from BM saying "it was legally and morally wrong (what morals for you BM?????) of PH to keep me(BM) from contacting StepDemon last night.SD had no phone to use all night, what if there had been an emergency, she had no way to call anyone. You have no legal authority to leave no phone available." I am sure that DH will have an email and plethora of calls as well.
So tired of SD17 right now. DH is PC and has been til last March, when she went to live w/BM for 3mos. DISASTER. Judge ordered her back to us in the best interest of child. Yes, we are the better parents. We have rules, we discipline, we are NOT YOUR FRIEND. However, I am tired of dealing with her. DH has been working late last few weeks. Normally, I pretty much let him handle her anymore, as it is obvious that BM has worked her PAS charm to the max over the years and the SD believes everything she says. For some reason, DH and I are supposed to be "perfect." Not sure why?
Been relativley good w/disengaging, which is difficult when DH is the PC, so SD17 lives w/us 90% of time. But last night, just lost it. SD went to talk to boss because DH had told her several times that she COULD NOT work over Labor Day weekend, as we go camping every year at this time as a family, and there was NO WAY we would let her stay at home by herself. SD obviously was hoping DH would change his mind because she didn't tell boss and was scheduled. DH had her go up to talk to boss last night to explain.
SD(19) grew up w/DH as PC, only eowknd visitation w/BM. For past 2 months has been living w/BM and SD---they charge her $300/month to live there sharing a small room w SD17 when there---it is a trailer so I am sure this is more than half of their mortgage payment. BM calls DH last night---they are on vacation w/SD17, but forgot to pay water bill before left so water turned off (LIE #1--don't know any service that turns off if not already behind for a few months). SD called upset, has no water, etc... refuses to go up street and ask for water from neighbors, only has $5 to her name.