So, I guess I reached my threshold. Let my husband after giving it one last attempt to sit down and talk to him about our marriage, kids and finances. His brother had been at our house for a month after husband saying he was only staying there for a weekend. His brother is nice but an ex heroin addict which smokes weed still. As you see my concerns with our kids. When I tried to approach husband he shewed me away saying he didn’t want to talk about anything with me. Mind you, I’ve been trying for 3 months to sit down and talk about “US”.
So, my husband and I have been fully responsible for his kids since we got full custody in January due to BM Meth addiction. Since then she ran away with her boyfriend, almost died. The kids don’t hear from her and is constantly brining tension to our home due to the inability of my husband to cope with what’s going on. I have a 13 year of my own and share our 17 month old with my husband. He has 2 of his own 8 and 13. It’s been a hell of a ride. Fast forward to today- He recieved a phone call from baby mama since she has been somewhat ok for 1 week after he drug binge again.
I’ve been separated from my husband for reason I stated in my previous blogs. I’ve been taking my SD every Wednesday to her piano lessons since I promised I would and I don’t want to be another women to let her down. The thing is that my H doesn’t try to spend any alone time with our daughter (15 Months) since I left. He tells me “ask your mom, isn’t that why you went to live with her”. Or He’ll throw jabs at me. So, I’m done asking and I guess that’s what I will put down when filing for full custody.
My husband Baby Mama has always been an issue in our marriage. During CPS investigation BM had Meth in her system and we ended up getting full custody. Which explains the irratic baga Vito coming from her that everybody accused me of just having something against her. We received full custody Jan and since then she lost her home, moved out of state, ran away with her bf that molested her daughter which was part of the CPS investigation and overdosed and was in a coma for 5 days. During that time is has been nothing but a ball of depression at our house.
HD and I still aren’t talking. After him snapping at me for giving my opinion it really hurt. I put all my efforts and energy in helping him out with SD7 and SS12 after his mom basically threw them out. Now, he seems to think that since she returned after two weeks and now wants the kids back I should have no say and feels stuck in the middle of BM and I. When I express my feelings about the situation of him saying what he said to me he ignores it and pretends he’s hurt and upset at me fore feeling hurt.
My husband and I have been attending marriage counseling as well and individual counseling for the past 4 months and so far so good. Our daughter is happy and my son is doing great. You would think I would start enjoying my peaceful life but not if my husband babymama can help it, I guess. This isn’t just another post to bash baby mama. What I’m stating are facts not assumptions to make her look bad. The problem is this. She has played a huge role in causing drama in my home since I met my husband. Mostly after we married.
My husband has been on top of paying his child support for his kids for his two kids he had with his ex and has always been really responsible which I love. But he also gives her money ($500) for back to school clothes and we buy them the school supplies. Lately she’s been textin my husband for more financial help. Which he hides from me and does it so I won’t find out. She has a house of her own, she doesn’t work due to her overdosing and almost dying and she lost her job because she couldn’t handle it anymore.
My husband and I have been attending marriage counseling for about 2 months now and things were going ok. Not great but better. Last night I went through his phone for the first time in a long time since I was trying to let him show me I can trust him after everything (read previous blogs) but I was disappointed again. I saw he was deleting texts between him and his ex. When I approached him he denied it at first but then admitted he was afraid I would get upset so he deleted them. If it was innocent and about the kids then why not just tell me or leave them there? I wasn’t even angry.
My husband decided to seek marriage counseling and so far today will be the 5th session. We’re doing better but still living apart. I’m not convinced or should I say trust that things won’t go back to being the same as they used to. In marriage counseling he realized his ex needs to take care of the kids on her time and to stay away from her personal life which was hard since their oldest son always came and told him the moms issues back at their house. My husband felt like he neeed to be more involved over there and neglected us mentally and emotionally.