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JRI's Blog

OT: Gifts for Older Adults

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This is a public service announcement for anybody wondering what to give an older parent or grandparent.  DH85 and I(77) still live independently in a middle class suburb.  We already have all the things we need or want and, actually, are trying to divest some of it.  I know we are hard to buy for but here are some ideas:

Help me understand this, please

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My SGD, "M", SD61's daughter, texted me yesterday asking if everything was ok with Grandpa, DH85.  I said, yes, he's still his crazy self, lol.  She said her mom, SD61, had told her DH85 only had six months to live.  I told her that was news to me since his oncologist says he will live to 100 and die of something other than prostate cancer.

Were our DHs seduced?

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I typed a reply to Marianne's post about her SD's letter where, among other things, she expressed her wish that DH had asked permisdion to marry Marianne.  It got me thinking.  Why do these SKs believe their dad's were innocent victims of us?

Don't they understand their dad's initiated and wanted this relationship?  I just dont get it.

Just a little vent

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You all know my story with SD60 who has stolen, lied, manipulated and made trouble for years.  Nowadays, I grayrock her so we have a civil and polite relationship.

She came over today to bring something and stayed for awhile so I naturally hid my purse.   To me, it was obvious she wanted to angle for $ from DH, after all, it's toward the end of the month and she doesn't get her disability $ til the first.  Now that he and I have separated finances, that's his problem.  

SD60's excuse

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SD60 finally called DH85 today.  Friday night, we had car trouble, DH told SD to stand by in case we needed her.  We were on the side of a busy highway in the dark for about 2 hours.  DH called her releatedly, no answer and no reply to his messages.  It's been 4 days with no, "Did you get home okay, Dad?"  Today, I told DH I was angry that she hadn't answered his calls or checked on him later.

How to let go of anger?

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The seasoned STers know my story with SD60.  For any new readers, she's been a long-time (50 year) manipulative, lying, thieving troublemaking Daddee's girl.  After her last disasterous stint living with us 5 years ago, I have grayrocked her.  I keep things polite and civil for DH85's sake.  We subsidize her living expense, she's unemployed and on disability.   He's a cancer patient, luckily doing well, and she regularly tears up about his condition, her love for him and dramatic predictions of her reaction when he passes.  He deserves her devotion for the untold times he has rescued her fr

Jealousy

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I admit that some of my negative reaction to SD60 is due to jealousy.  Yes, She's a lying, manipulative thief.  But even if she were a saint, I'd still be jealous of the time, love, attention and devotion she evokes from DH84.

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