Hey all,

I haven't posted much recently and this is my first blog.

I want to ask a question where the answer is likely very simple yet feels complicated.

(I am a SM with SKs and a bio child). Some context. Had step kids for the last 22 years. At times it has been 'good' and at times very toxic. I finally put a boundary around it - which I should have done years ago - but it was always my hope that things would improve. I realised that actually the first 10 years with their mother (with likely undiagnosed BPD) did more damage than could be repaired. 

Hi Everyone,

  Sorry I've been away for awhile. I was dealing with a health issue but I'm fine now. SD18 graduates in a week and DH and I were happy and excited to have some extra income now that CS is stopping. 

Yes folks after 17 years we are Beaver freeeeeeeeee.  The crotch goblin extortion is now ended.  I need a t-shirt that says. I survived Beaver and the cg extortion.  DH was a ball of anxiety and annoyance but we made it through the ceremony.   I don't take his shiznit personally now.  I wore a new dress and my louboutins and looked amazing I must say.   Next up grad party tomorrow and SD will start cosmology in September.  
 

DH and I are now empty nesters.  Woohoo 

Be honest...

During my bio's graduation my relative acted imo inappropriate and I respectfully said something about said behavior which triggered this relative to lash out at me  

My older relative helped pay a portion of my bio's school so I felt obligated to invite them despite knowing this persons past history of behavior (ex. Once I pay money for you, I can do whatever tf I want type of attitude) 

I know that its been annoying and frustrating enough when ANYONE throws the whole speech about how us Stepparents should have thought about everything before linking up with someone who had a Child so we knew what we signed up for. I know that I cant be the only one who had their ( adult) Stepchild try to use that old Chestnut against them? 

One of my nephews is graduating HS and of course I am going. SO then talked about SD and another one of my nephews graduating next year. I mentioned that I hope they are not on the same day.  He said he of course has to go to SD and I said of course I have to go to my nephews. He said I can't even talk about you not going to SD and had tears in his eyes. I can't see a concern a year out. We were just having a conversation. Unfortunately I will choose my nephews over his children. I don't have a bond with his kids. My nephews are my family . What are your thoughts ?  

If anyone here loves reggae or even just likes it well enough - its live streaming cali roots 3 days of music :

https://www.californiarootsfestival.com/

I live about 30 miles away...tickets are expensive at $155 each. Husband may be able to get me a backstage artist pass for this Sunday, so please everyone cross your fingers and toes!!!

My fave is playing tonight - Stick Figure. (Scott)

Some parents need to be exterminated via long term torturous suffering.

This little girl was tortured to death and suffered byond the comprehension of anyone who has not experienced toxically elevated blood glucose and DKA (Diabetic Keto Acidosis).  The misery this baby suffered is indescribable.

SS12 arrives today for his first visit of summer break. He will be here for a week, then return to BM for a week, then return here for 3 weeks. DH is completing the 8 hour roundtrip drive as we speak to pick him up. 

All has been mostly quiet on the BM front. She did rush SS to the doctor over a bug bite two weeks ago, concerned he had Lymes Disease (again hypochondriac). Nope, it was nothing more than a mosquito bite. Otherwise, just a few school updates here and there. I'm grateful that nothing earth shattering occurred between scheduling our visit and now. 

DH's dad lives about 5 hours away and is remarried. Grandparent is early 70s and retired. He constantly complains about not seeing his grandkids. He does not call or Facetime to check on them though. He makes comments to DH such as "I wish we could all go on a beach family vacation." Grandfather continuously guilts DH, even though HE is the one with the flexible schedule and makes no effort.