I raised an adult daughter. It was just me and her most of her life. This is my first serious BF with kids.

My BF has 3 kids he gets 50/50 with a narcissist BM, 10 yo girl, 6 & 17 yo boys. 

BF bought a house recently and we are preparing to move in together. We've been together a yr and the kids LOVE me (BM different story lol) and I love them as well

So the current situation - the court order is no overnights unless engaged or married (BM does whatever she wants, but usually dumps the kids to her parents on weekends)

It's been over 8 years dealing with my stepdaughter. She's approaching 12 and my god it's getting worse by the day with her. 
I can honestly say I treat her as my own child, always have and always will. Now, she is unbelievably disrespectful. It's obviously learned behavior with so much evidence that it is. Her mother allows and knows she gives attitude, disrespects her father, and treats him like shit.

One of my no boundary relatives (who always tries to demand immediate or next day meetups) asked to come over ... at the  end of the week (because they assume I'm working for my employer) lol!!!

I'm thinking to myself "wow sufficient advance notice for once in their lives" but I realize that when people think you create your own schedule (ex self employed), you are not working for employer, you're stay at home parent, etc they assume they can bombard your time. 
 

What is wrong with me. Why am I not out of this relationship. And why am I not worth SO putting an end to what he does?SO will not put up the boundaries with BM and kids like he was told by the therapist.  He won't stop. He continues to let BM text him every day. Yesterday it was about something SS said to a coach( it wasn't mean this time)Okay if you can't control BM you can control your own fingers and not text her back. But he did . Now baseball season had started and it will give her very easy reasons to Text because of pick ups and asking if SO is going to the games.

Today I have become so angry at SD14's behavior that I have a hard time envisioning coming back from this anytime soon. I'm talking years. 
 

Can I vent about BM please? SS15 has baseball practice twice a week. Travel ball is almost all year round. We love that he plays and we make sure he gets where he needs to be. BM recently moved to our neighborhood, like you can see her apartment building from our back yard close

A few weeks ago, I saw a chat where a few of my colleagues saying they were called into a meeting where it was explained to them they'd be let go in 1-2 weeks due to business needs. Other colleagues including myself didn't get that meeting so I thought I'd be good. 

Until I log in and look at my calendar and see nothing on there. 

So I can only assume I met the same fate as the others but at least they had the luxury of a couple weeks advance notice. 

DH and SS's (19) relationship is basically non existent at this point. (They are long distance but had always been close during the visitation years). 

Since Christmas, DH has spoken to him exactly once at which point he asked the kid if he had realized how long it had been since they had spoken. Every communication or attempt at communication comes from DH. The kid laughed it off and for probably the first time ever DH's tone was not as nice or understanding or empathetic or jokey or etc. He straight up told the kid it wasn't funny.

I have been with my husband for 3 years now and we have 5 kids combined. He has 3 kids; 7, 17, and 21 and I have a 16 and 21 yo. The 7, 16, and 17 yo live under our roof and we have our kids full time. We both came out of 16 year marriages to partners that were unfaithful and this relationship seem to be everything we were both looking for. Unfortunately, his BM had a lot of mental issues and that put a huge strain on our relationship but we were able to figure it out.

And I can not wait to hit the road!!!! It has been a stressful month at work and a stressful few days with MIL butting in the middle of DH and SD14. We have been spending the weekend prepping and packing for our week long trip to Florida so I have not had time for any extra dramatics. I'm sure MIL was not happy to learn that her guilt trip/ pressure on DH did not work. She made plans for him to drive 3 hours ( 6 total) with SIL this weekend to see sD14 play volleyball. He declined because the tires on our needed to be rotated this weekend and oil change needed to be done.