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What to do?

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Well, I spoke with my SS this weekend and he said that he was thinking of getting married, but he didn't know how to tell his dad that we wouldn't be invited to the wedding because it would hurt his mom and the SD too much. When I asked him if he realized how bad his dad and his half brother would be hurt, he had no comment other than that he loves his sister so much and he hates to see her hurt and that she is more important to him.

I just feel like screaming

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I just want to scream. Last night the SD calls her dad and says to meet her outside the house because she wants to talk to him without the bitch (which would be me, I guess). So she drives up and sits on my front porch yelling and cussing at her father. She tells him that he has never been a father, etc., etc. Then she informs him that she hopes that I die from my breast cancer. Her exact words were "I hope that f***ing b**** dies! I hope she f***ing dies and leaves you all alone!" All of this is going on with my 11 year old son in the house with one of his friends.

Evil Step-Mom Strikes Again

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Well, I guess the "evil" step-mom had struck again it seems. Or at least that is what my SD has told her father. She called him yesterday to inform him that she was no longer a part of our lives. It's all my fault and in her words I got what I always wanted. It amazes me that someone can put the blame on me when she is the one who has had nothing at all to do with this family since having us thrown in jail and not speaking to anyone in over a year, steps back in one day and expects things to be like nothing every happened.

SD Equals Selfish

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Well, I thought I would post on the selfishness of my step-daughter. Hubby called her and the step-son last week to inform them of Christmas plans for this year. He called them both back on Friday to tell them what time we would be eating, etc. We had Christmast at our home with hubby's parents and sister yesterday and invited both of the step-children. When hubby spoke to them they both said Christmas Eve was perfect for them. Step-son showed up and and we really enjoyed him. Step-daughter was a NO SHOW!

Well I hope everyone had a ................

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Happy Thanksgiving! I felt pretty good yesterday so we went out to my uncle's house for dinner. Had an enjoyable time and came home to nap for a bit. We never heard a word from SS or SD, but really never expected to either. To update on the insurance dilemna, we had to drop both children from the plan. Also, found out that we should have contacted them the minute the SD was no longer enrolled in school. Of course, that's kind of hard to pinpoint since we had not seen or spoken to her until the week or so before her request to keep her on the insurance.

Pity Party

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I am having a bit of a "pity party" for myself today I guess. I just had a bit of a mental break down! After all of my strong talk about being ready to get the show on the road, now that I know when I start chemo, I am scared to death. This morning has just been so overwhelming for me I guess. I went for physical therapy today and my arms feel like noodles. I have to go back 4 more times for sure. When I got home, I got the call from my oncologist telling me I start chemo on Monday. I was supposed to return to work on Monday but looks like that won't be the case now.

Help

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Ok this is what I received back from our insurance company on the step-daughter and medical insurance. My brain has processed so much already with my cancer and treatments that this is not making any sense to me. Can somebody help me translate this? Is it saying that because we were ordered in the divorce to carry insurance that we have to continue until she's 24 or am I reading it the wrong way? The step-daughter is 19, unmarried, lives with her biomom and has a full time job, not going to school. Thanks!

Update

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Well yesterday I went to see Dr. Reaves, the oncologist. Who is also the same doctor that my mother used when she had cancer. My appointment was for 1:30 pm. So we drive to the hospital where his office is located and it looks as if the building had been evacuated. It was a fire drill! First of all, they had about 15 chemo patients standing outside attached to their IV's and it hit me. I will be one of them soon. Several looked really good and actually healthy and others looked like death warmed over. It was such a shock to see this for me. I got a little "teary".

I'm Back

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Well, it's me again! I wanted to post a little note to let everyone know that I am alive and kicking! Surgery went well and they removed both breasts and approximately 9 to 12 lymph nodes. (I'm a little foggy on the lymph nodes!) There was no cancer in the lymph nodes but approximately 6 cm of invasive cancer in the left breast. Therefore, I still have to go through chemo. Unsure on radiation, but will find that out when I visit the oncologist. Physically I am doing well. It was a major shock seeing myself the first time after surgery but think I am dealing with all of it fairly well.

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