Went to counseling. With DH. Let DH lead. We were united.
I am shocked to say I felt counseling was worthwhile.
I do not believe SD13 is telling the counselor much beyond what her mother dearest has instructed her to say or carefully put into her head over months of manipulation. Nonetheless, I did get some tips on how to maintain my cool when dealing with a stone-faced adolescent who spies on me and craps on my kindness in a way that is so quiet, it can barely be addressed.
I often wake up with thoughts of sincere sympathy for my SD13. I worry for her future, for her development as a human being in a world that (mostly) values honesty and individuality. I imagine her future will be riddled with emotional blowups and lost friends. Or it will be some elaborate scheme where she is just like BM, absolutely hollow and at the “top” of her imaginary world.
Okay - I'm joining the "my skid is failing in school" club here on STalk!
So, per the PAS handbook, DH has been blocked by HCBM for several years now from accessing OSS13's school grades.
NOW all of a sudden HCBM wants help from DH because WHAM: OSS13 is failing almost ALL of his classes, and has been for a few years now.
I met my DH 9 years ago and we got married a couple years later. He has 2 daughters who are now 17 and 16 and I have 2 bios who are 17 and 15. I know, 4 teenagers right!!! I believe at first my dh and I were naive in that we thought we could blend a family. I did not know what I was up against as far as BM went at all. She was unmedicated with huge mental health issues, had disowned a teenage son from another marriage, and a completely horrible person.