I have been a step mom for over 22 years. The kids were 17 and 13 when I came in to the picture. My husband at that time had custody of is daughter who was the 17 year old at hen my step son turned 14 he too then came and lived with us. From almost day one they both told me that I was not their mom. Little did they know I didn't want to be. I was however willing to love them and help guide them through life. It is now 22 years later and our relationship couldn't get any worse with my SD that is. She is a piece of work.