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O/T idiot DH

Merry's picture

I am too embarrassed to talk about this with any of my IRL friends.

My idiot husband allowed a stranger remote access to his computer. From a cold call. Because they offered him a "good deal" and showed him shiny pictures of a website deal.

And guess what? $1000 has been transferred out of our bank account. SHOCKER. It's a damn good thing I have automatic notifications of bank activity -- I caught it instantly and the bank was able to stop it. I am still cleaning up from the last financial scam (not his fault, or mine, that one, but I'm still out $900 from a larger fraud case.) HE HAD NO CLUE that he was being distracted with pretty pictures while they got his logins and passwords. The man has a frickin PhD and ZERO sense.

 I HATE being the only adult in my house.


hereiam's picture

Oh my God! Don't you just want to beat them (husbands) over the head? I'm glad you were able to stop it.

thinkthrice's picture

admin rights! make his a std user

Step-girlfriend's picture

My SO signed up for a porn site once that required a Debit card and charged like $2.99 per click, I think? I don’t care if he watches porn, but you can get it for FREE so I was annoyed that he paid for it. Plus it was a total scam, and they really meant “per click”. They ended up taking $700 out of his bank account for like an hour of use. He called and they refunded about half, but still...$350 in porn?!? I was not amused. He’s not a dumb guy generally, and he knew he was a complete idiot for putting his debit card into a porn site.

susanm's picture

Yikes!  Have you changed the passwords on everything else?  If they had access to your computer they got all of your emails/automatic payments and can go through them at their leisure to access all of your credit cards and bank accounts.  They can also use your info to open accounts in your name that you will never know about until they default on them and they show up on your credit report.  You may want to think about contacting one of the identify protection companies that monitor the use of your social security number and notfy you whenever it is used for anything.

I commpletely understand about being the only adult in the house.  My DH is a wonderful man but he has the attention span of a housefly.  The "discovery" of adult ADHD is the worse thing ever as far as I am concened.  It has given him an excuse for everything and I am really tired of hearing it.  ADHD does not allow you to be irresponsible and force your spouse to always be the one making sure the damned house does not burn down because you forget to turn off the oven!  He complained bitterly about how BM stopped being fun once the kids came along.  Well no sh*t - someone had to make sure that they stayed alive while he played with them.  My fun side has rapidly dwindled too and I don't appreciate it!

Merry's picture

Yep. Once I explained to DH what the scammers could do with the info on his computer, he was mortified. He absolutely did not know.

Fortunately, it is HIS computer. I have never used it, ever. I do all the banking and other financial activities, but he does occasionally check a balance. All logins, passwords, and security questions changed. That's a good idea about the identity protection companies. I'll look into that.

My DH also has adult ADHD and it makes his life miserable, and mine as well. I agree, it can be a crutch. "I was just so scattered." "I thought I had done xyz." "I forgot by the time I got to the other end of the house." "I left it in my car." I put the wrong date on my calendar." I love the man completely, but I am exhausted.


Major Blunder's picture

I spent several years in academia and found some of the most brilliant minds in their respective fields were some of the dumbest people at common sense and plain everyday stuff, PhDs no longer impress me, now several PhDs in various fields? that's another story  lol

Merry's picture

I work in a university too. With researchers. I have worked with actual brain surgeons and rocket scientists. They are brilliant, but usually can't find matching socks.

Siemprematahari's picture

I work at a University as well with researches, Professors, you name it. They have PhD's and are educated from the best Ivy League colleges in the world like Harvard, Pace, Princeton and a good 95% lack common sense that it's mind boggling. There has to be a study on this.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Book Smarts and Common sense are two VERY different things... It sounds like he's beyond book smart. But it's a good thing you're keeping an eye on the accounts for the common sense part Wink