You are here

ksmom14's Blog

Actually considering divorce - help!

ksmom14's picture

I can't beleive I actually typed it out...the couple beers probably helped...

DH and I have been struggling lately, for about 10 months I'd guess.

DH is  not a bad person, but I've been feeling that he just does not treat me the way I deserve to be treated. I feel like I do so much for him and yet he just asks for more, and more, and more.

Going to appointment with DH and BM

ksmom14's picture

This may get long, I'll try to keep it consise...3 skids (SS17, SD16, SD14) and 2 DDs (DD3, DD2) DH is primary, skids go to BM's every other weekend (other than SS17 he always stays with us becuase he works in our town). BM used to be very absent mom, would pass skids off to her mom on her weekends, constantly ask for swtiches, or late pick ups, etc. She then had a baby with her BF and they moved in, since then she's become....better. DH and I still do all appointments, any school issues, etc.

Is it normal to just not like your DH sometimes? - OT

ksmom14's picture

So this isn't really step related...isn't associated with skid issues, but DH and I have REALLY been struggling lately.

I don't really have anyone in my personal life to talk to about it so here I am.

I've been seriously considering divorce and if it's the right thing for us to do. I don't hate him, but I feel like if that's where we're heading it would be better to do it when we don't hate each other and are super bitter towards each other so that we can be amicable.

What's the right consequence here?

ksmom14's picture

SS17 got a job about 9 months ago, it's been really great for him in that he's finally learned some responsibility for himself and it's helped him come out of his shell a bit. The downside is he's been working A LOT of hours, it's gotten up to a scheduled 30 hours a week, working about 6 days a week. DH kept telling him to make sure it wasn't interferring with his school work, as that is the priority, but SS has liked the bigger paychecks and has not reduced his hours. 

Should I say something to BM?

ksmom14's picture

So if you read my last blog, DH and I sold SS17 my old car and BM tried to tell him that we asked for too much money, and that we're trying to cheat and scam him out of money because of some water damage he caused a while back.

So last night DH and I talked to SS17, pulled up the Kelley Blue Book site, showed him the trade in value vs. the private party sale value, explained to him the difference and talked about the price we sold it to him. We wanted to make sure he felt good about the purchase. 

Noncustodial BM trying out PAS

ksmom14's picture

SS17 bought a car from BM's brother a while back. It was a complete piece of crap, DH did not get to see it before it was purchased, and tried to trust BM when she explained that it was fine for the price ($600). Well it lasted about 6 months before the tires were bald and it was unsafe for SS17 to drive it anymore. SS17 had been saving up to buy a new vehicle and had a few thousand dollars, but not the full $5,000 he wanted before purchasing. I was planning on buying a new vehicle in July, and was going to save my car for SD13, and SD15 to use.

Fight with DH...not sure where to go (long)

ksmom14's picture

DH and I have been together for over 6 years. We got together soon after I moved to the state (not knowing anyone) and him going thru a divorce (and losing any friendships he did have because BM "won" those friends). So it's just been the 2 of us most of this time.I have a friend from high school that moved to the area that I go out to dinner with at most every other month. DH started a bowling league that goes every Tuesday after DD18 months was born because he needed to get out of the house for himself.

Follow up to "DH is "sick" again"

ksmom14's picture

Last week I vented about DH seeming to be "sick" all the time and staying home from work. Well I ended up being the b*^$# in this situation because when I got home I checked his temperature and he had a low grade fever Sad see the blog post here:

Just looking to vent - DH "sick" again

ksmom14's picture

DH is the typical man (sorry StepTalk guys) that gets the "man cold", if I have that same cold I'm still pushing through and do my daily tasks, at most I'll go to bed an hour or so early. If DH is sick he is laid up in bed, calls in sick to work, and pushes all parenting to me. He'll stay home, do a few things like take care of the chickens (collect eggs and give them food), clean up any dishes left, and maybe do a load of laudry, but then when I get home, he cannot help and is back in bed.