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I am so tired, would like to call it quits!

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I feel bad for saying so, but I would like to pack up my & DS things and leave. I feel guilty for disengaging! DH does EVERYTHING for SD, her wash, wake up calls, medical appointments, well everything! But I am feeling absolutely terrible.

DH has been getting out of work late & so I was left to help SD with her homework, I stopped because of her attitude. Well she did it again! She was banging her fists on the table, making her bull-ready to-attack noises, & trying to break the pencil attitude. All because I wouldn't give her the answer.

VALIDATION!!!

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Well it was about TIME!!! The rose color glasses DH has been wearing when he see's SD are finally breaking. She seems to always turn into a "perfect" little angle when daddy is around, so when I tell him about her attitude, the one that looked stupid was ME.

So what happened you ask??... great question, glad you asked!!!

I am an IDIOT!!!

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Well, I have been alone in this parenting thing the last few days. DH has been working very late and so I have been doing it all myself. I don't mind it because as soon as I pick them up it is homework time, bath time, and then (my favorite) SLEEP TIME!! which means it is my wine time!!

Almost got me...

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DH has been working SD pretty hard lately. He is upset that she has gained SO MUCH weight. She is tall for her age, just about my height, which isn't saying much since I'm 5', but is heavier than me. DH hates that she wears XXL and that she is ALWAYS asking for desserts. No matter where we go, she is asking for candy, ice cream, cookies, etc. So anyway, he has been taking her out on runs, playing basketball, and tennis.

I think I am making progress

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I haven't really posted because I am TRYING to disengage. I am also a lot more stern with her. I still have to sorta walk on egg shells due to the fact that we have yet to go to court to actually get custody. I am not sure what to expect and so we don't really want to be too hard on her, well DH doesn't want ME to be too hard on her, and have her tell the therapist I am abusing her or something. EVERYTHING we do is wrong. I have a full-time job, my DS, my house to run, and (kinda) of a life; she (therapist) expects me to drop everything to ensure that all of SD's needs are met.

UPDATE: I give up

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SO I TRIED giving SD a taste of her own medicine, ignored her when she asked me a question. I am sad and disappointed to say that she didn't even notice. I broke down and spoke to DH tonight about what had happened today and to my surprise he didn't get upset. NO argument... YAY!!!!

I told him how I spoke to her... AGAIN... and how she just ignored me. He said that he understand how difficult that may be and couldn't imagine how that would feel. I told him that it hurts. I try and I try but it hurts to know that she is doing nothing to work it out.

i want to give up! i tried...

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I am writing this on my phone so, I apologize for any grammar & punctuation errors!

DH & DS went to an appointment this morning & so I was left alone with SD. I asked her to change her clothes because the shorts she chose were too short. She got upset because she didn't want to change and she thought she looked perfect. I told her we were going to a dinner party & I wanted to change her pants because I felt they were too short. After her huffin & puffin she changed.

continuation from Previous post... gonna lose it

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First of all... I want to say thank you all. I am sorry to hear that you are all suffering from depression also, and wish you all the very best.

I resent both DH and SD. I resent SD because she doesn't like to listen to me. She pretends like she does but, as mother, I know that it is going in one ear & out the other. I resent her because of her ways, they may not be her fault completely but I resent her.

I looks like she is staying...

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It appears as though SD will become a permanent fixture of my household. Although we have been gotting better at bearing one another, many things she does or says get on my nerves.

BM has yet to call and speak to SD. She apparently returned to her crack-head daze and doesn't remember she has a daughter. The one left suffering is SD. I do feel bad that she doesn't have a relationship with her mother, but why DID I get myself in this situation?

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