I looks like she is staying...
It appears as though SD will become a permanent fixture of my household. Although we have been gotting better at bearing one another, many things she does or says get on my nerves.
BM has yet to call and speak to SD. She apparently returned to her crack-head daze and doesn't remember she has a daughter. The one left suffering is SD. I do feel bad that she doesn't have a relationship with her mother, but why DID I get myself in this situation?
BM called a TWO times to see if she could see SD, but since there is no CO as to who has custody we couldn't let her see her. We don't know what BM would do, especially since she is unemployed and the only money she is getting is from DH, the CS, because he WONT GET OFF HIS ASS and put a stop to it.
He tells me we have to save money and we can't just go out and spend, but yet HE CONTINUES TO PAY HER CS even though I AM DOING ALL THE JOB!!!! :jawdrop:
Anyway, BM has yet to call and ask for SD so I am guessing she has yet to receive the letter from our lawyer stating we are seeking primary custody. I am guessing when she does receive the letter we will hear her because that means she will no longer be getting CS money.
What to do??? I am beside myself at the stupidity, selfishness, laziness, and overall disregard of others time (which is selfishness) I know! I almost wish I could walk away. Take MY child and go live my life. I don't know what to do, I think I need to return to therapy because I feel I am reaching my breaking point.
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I see you also have a
I see you also have a 'requires bomb under ass' husband. It is a year since my SD moved in full time. I had to press repeatedly for him to reduce his CS to BM to reflect the fact that she only had custody of one child not two. He avoids stirring things up with BM at all costs and was worried that she would do something to prevent SD moving in with us.
In the end I calculated the cost of having SD in residence, including groceries, clothing, allowance and counselling (we put her into counselling shortly after she moved in). Putting it in black and white made it patently clear that we could not afford the additional costs without the CS money and he did bite the bullet and have the conversation with BM, and even managed to summon up some annoyance when she claimed she could not manage on reduced CS, despite the fact she had just come back from a holiday abroad when we had not had a proper holiday for 3 years.
I saw a counsellor myself for a while after SD moved in, I wanted to establish the best relationship I could with her but it was stressful and I needed to vent to someone who was not going to feel conflicted about my stress and defensive about his daughter. Maybe that is something you could consider?