The past year and a half has been extremely stressful for me. I left a well-paying job, family, friends, my hometown to move to exbf's hometown to try and create a blended family, which was extremely stressful. In addition to our blended family failing, we broke up, which has been very difficult. I also lost my job after the new year and despite working my ass off to get another job and several close calls (between me and one other person...other candidate getting chosen) I am still unemployed.

When my BF came to me during our break (initiated by me)he said he was going to change a lot of things in his life, including EOD (yes, you read it right!) arrangement to EOWE with one dinner date during the week. Against my gut, I've been spending time with him, trying to wait to see the developments. However, I just cannot wait anymore for something that could take two months or two years and it might not even make a difference with us!

I just wonder how many people on here are just scraping by financially d/t the first marriage/divorce. Money can be a huge issue in a first marriage, never mind a second. For me, I'd rather scrape together money all on my own minus the bullshit involved with CS, divorce debt, and effing emotional BS of an ex wife, a bratty kid or two, mother in laws, complex relationships that essentially make a man into a ball-less wonder. Are there any men with kids that are financially sound? I wonder if the financial part of the step relationships are so difficult that it alone makes things difficult.

Just curious what you feel are the most important things you look for in a relationship. Of course I want love, to love, physical attraction, good communication, good sex, shared morals/goals (I don't want much, huh? LOL) I also really want security. I know I can manage my life on my own in all ways because I have and do, but damn, I'd really like to have a man around that can provide some financial security. I guess I am old fashioned, but it's a real turnoff to me as a woman to feel a man is dependent on me emotionally or financially.