Pregnancy Dementia? (OT)
Well I never thought that being pregnant could bring such a crazy change in everything about me. I'm so emotional right now and I don't know what to do. My mom is away visiting her sisters and my best friend, well she does not think that DH is good enough for me, so she's hard to talk to. So here it is, the things that have me wondering if maybe we are not right for eachother.
When I'm sick or just plan tired, why is it that he can not stand to just lay with me. Let me know he's there and he cares?
Why is it that runnning up town for me is such a terrible thing for him to do when I have heard the stories of him running up town in the middle of the night for her, when she had a craving even though he had to work the next day.
Why is it so hard for him to help around the house without complaining?
Why isn't anything I do good enough? Why isn't anything I give enough?
I just feel so neglected, even though I have seen him trying to help. Its like he does all the right things at the wrong times. Sometimes I just want him to be next to me, and thats when he decides to do the laundry or the dishes. Sometimes I just want to see the house alittle cleaner, and thats when he wants to groupe me, or just sit around. When I want to play our computer games together, he wants to watch movies. When I want to watch movies he just wants to sit on the computer. WTF? Why can't anything work? Why do I feel like I'm always alone? The idea of leaving him leaves me with a hole in my chest that aches worse then a bad toothache, but I'm tired of explaining to him what I need.
And now, he thinks maybe he should just give up on trying to get the munchkin back. I'm almost ready to agree with him. He drives me insane when he is responsible for her, he can't do dishes and cook at the same time. He can't watch a movie with her and tidy up or do laundry. He lets everything go until he has no timie for me, or himself. I just don't understand how everything seems so hard to him. Shouldn't love be easy? Or at least easier? Pregnancy is supposed to be this enchanting wonderful time. We have created a life together. Thats a miracle. But it feels like he just doesn't have the capacity to do all that needs to be done.
Am I just crazy? Please tell me these feelings will go away!