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When do you give up?

Thetis's picture

So here I sit in early labour, waiting for DH to wake up so we can drive the two hours to be closer to the hospital, and all I can think about is Munchkin (SD4) and how her newly preggo mom is planning on moving her away again to live with another new guy in another new city. This is the third move this year and the second StepDad for munchkin.
Dh is ready to just give up. He's shrugging it off and is thinking about just asking for one or two weekends a month (we get her every weekend right now). It just breaks my heart. I wish I could stand up and fight for her. It feels like I'm losing her again, and at such an important time. She is frustrating but really she's my little buddy and I'm going to miss her.
Realistically we don't have the money or time to do the big court battle we would need to go through. I'm just feeling so defeated right now. I wish BM could have waited a month, or even pulled this last month. But right now, there is nothing I can do. I am literally having a baby. Maybe I can convince DH to see a lawyer while we wait for labour to progress.


Pantera's picture

Stop worrying and enjoy being in labour (well, i guess you can't really enjoy it, lol). CONGRATS!!! Save the worrying for later, you have other things to worry about right now.

SusiQ's picture

Good Luck!!!! I'm just waiting for labor to start. You do need to try and focus on you and your new LO and enjoy this time but I completely understand. You have a relationship with your SD and it's hard not to think about that at this time. Having DS really made me think about my dealings with my SKids.

I hope everything works out on the SD front and I wish you a quick and speedy delivery!!!

zenjetset's picture

Doesn't your DH have a divorce decree that indicates BM can't move child no more than xx number of miles?

sadstep's picture

Take it easy during this labor not good to get too uptight right now for the baby. I admire you for having so much love for sd4. she is lucky that she has you because obviously her mother isn't thinking of her needs. I also know that sd4 will have to deal with this instability from her mother for her liftime. Mothers don't change so much sometimes, just as my sons Dad didn't change much, they have a good relationship but my son knows that when push comes to shove and he needs someone, he calls his Mom. Maybe sd4 will grow to realize you are HER rock

happymostly's picture

I agree with blendedfam on this one, there are options that arent costly. You can fight the move without an attorney. It is instability for her to be constantly moved around. But try not think about it right now! just have the baby and one thing at a time! Congrats!!

mom2five's picture

One thing at a time, sweetie. Get through the labor. Rest and heal. Enjoy your new baby for a few weeks. Then deal with the custody issues.

When do you give up? Never. You never give up on a child.