Ss24 is currently on leave for work and is due to return mid December. He apparently didn’t set up his paperwork in advance so he reached out last month to ask me to borrow a couple of hundred dollars while he waited for his leave checks to be approved. 

To me, that would have meant 200 but I sent him 300. Mind you, I had lent him my vehicle during the summer and he accrued many tickets, and paid them all except for 2, which totaled 180. He said he paid for them but knowing him, he just didn’t have the money and didn’t pay. 

I’ve dreamed of freeing myself of my stepsons for at least 8 years. 

My original plan was to wait until Ss18 finished high school. 11 years I waited until the younger of the 2 was 18 and I would no longer feel obligated to do for them. I hoped Ss18 would change, that he’d respect house rules and function like a family. This was the only way I would have accepted DH dumping him on me to go on the road. Ss knew it and so did DH. 

I finally got an apartment. Very tiny studio, perfect for myself and my daughter. SS23 had his baby last month, and true to form, has already asked to borrow money. I loaned him some, and I did it because if I know him as well as I do, he will avoid calling so as to avoid paying it. Buys me some time from his presence. Not sure why he still can't save, though he is on a leave, and should be getting FMLA, but according to him, they "spent it all" in the past month. 

I threw SS23 his gender reveal party. It was a lot of work, considering I'm working and manage almost everything for DD8, but I wanted to help, seeing as I know BM is unable. It was a strange feeling to have people tell me "You must be so excited!", or "how exciting, right?". These were people who were there for SS's gf, and I don't believe there was malice behind it, I would attribute this more to ignorance. I'm wondering what the equivalent would be for stepmothers. For example, if someone were to ask stepchildren how excited they are to have a new...idk stepniece or stepnephew.