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For f*ks sake

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Anyone else's DH just a damn sucker?! He pays CS, he pays extra for SS17 car insurance, he chips in for SD10 gymnastics competition cost and he still wants to just hand them money for gas and buy them junk all the damn time. I'm beyond perturbed because SS17 is fully capable of getting a job but doesn't want to. And we are renovating a small property to move into when SS17 ages out to help save money and I am dumping so much $ into it and every time DH hands them cash that's less he contributes to this remodel.

Disengagement Advice

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I don't fully understand the intricacies of disengagement. I have no real issues with SD10. She does what she is told when she is Thanks to me, to be honest. I got to her early enough to instill that. 
I don't feel like I can continue to handle the amount of stress that comes with SS17 and BM. There's just so much rudeness and hate and then the endless threats and tireless manipulation. 

SS17 skipping visitation - vent

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SS17 has been skipping Wednesday night visitation at our house since he got a car, no biggie. We make dinner, he doesn't show up, it goes in the fridge as leftovers. This really hasn't caused any issues. He's a teenager that would rather hang out with his friends, makes sense to me. Also, since getting his car he spends at least 1 of his 2 EOWE nights at a friend's house instead of ours. Again, no biggie, it doesn't cause issues.