Bonus Wife's Blog
My DH is a wonderful, loving man to my daughter, 15. He's also wonderful to his Biological Kids. 18, 19, 22 who do not live with us....However, we have issues that I don't know how to resolve or get past. The main one is he oversteps his boundaries with my daughter.
1) he has read her diary WITHOUT my knowledge. then when he saw something not so good, he told me to read it and take care of it.
2) he withholds affection from her if she texts a boy he doesn't approve of
3) he checks her phone records every day practically and
Today I am so drained...Every day feels like a struggle trying to communicate with my husband. Everything is misinterpreted!!! All I know is we constantly have "power struggles." Today we fought over which pan to make eggs in. I'm losing it!! Honestly, I feel if I just keep my mouth shut about everything, and do not make any suggestions (whether it's about our kids or not, or whether my idea is better or not) and just become a yes person, life may be smoother.
Hi..I need help explaining how I feel to hubby. The average I see his kids is once a month when they visit. (He still sees them every week on his way home from work and speaks to them from work who knows how often.)
Well...not even two months later, another occasion came up where we had to hang out with my Dh's ex. This time instead of just Dh, her, and their 2 kids and me, more people were expected to attend the party at her house (where my hubby lived for 18 years with her) so I was okay with it. I promised myself I wouldn't torture myself as I peeked into their old bedroom, or wouldn't try to create scenarios of them two sitting outside on the deck...
My best friend (not married/no kids) accused me of being jealous of the exwife....then it dawned on me...
Maybe I am?
Right this minute I feel if the ex called my hubby and asked him to Jump...(because of something relating to the kids of course!) he'd speed dial her right back (while he was at work naturally, so I am not within earshot) and he'd ask her "How High?"
Fearless mentioned how furious she was when her DH told her "the sd can sleep over whenever she wants!!" (whether fearless was okay with it or not) which made me think: What was the one thing hubby said to me that made me see red also?
If I hear that phrase one more time I'm going to puke! Quick scenario:
For reasons that are way beyond my comprehension, Dh insisted that this year we had no choice but to go out to dinner with his exwife and his children to celebrate ss 16th birthday. I resisted this idea because in my heart we are not one big family…we are two now. I agreed thinking the exwifes parents would be there, the aunts, etc and it was a “family” celebration sort of get together but it turned out to be only me and |Dh’s old pre-divorce family.
Here I am again, struggling with "the past." I don't know about you but I need to see the whole picture if DH tells me a story. If I don't, questions start swirling in my head.
After last week's incident where I discovered DH bought his ex the traditional $135 hummel for his ex "from the kids" on Christmas and never got reimbursed from her, and never told me (because he knew I'd freak), I lost it as you can imagine.