Am I Unreasonable?
Nothing has really changed since my last post. SD goes back and forth from being sweet to being a turd. DH and I haven’t gone over our expectations with her still but she also hasn’t been with us much. She spent her 2 week Winter break with BM and has been a Negative Nancy since. Even to the point that DH has mentioned it to her and doesn’t enjoy being with her when she’s like that.
This past Thursday I came home from work and felt like I had to say “No, please stop” to just about everything she was doing. I even said out loud in front of SD and DH “why do I feel like I have to say No and Stop to everything tonight?” DH and I have a toddler and she’s to the point that she wants to do everything that “sissy” does and I’m not ok with that.
So today, BM calls to say that SD was out of contacts and if BM and DH could meet so he could drop them off. (BM and SD live about 40 minutes away from us, so there’s a designated meeting place.) We already had plans and DH said they could figure something out. After going out for a family member’s bday and going grocery shopping, DH had a headache and was pretty tired. Btw, he has a broken foot and is stubborn about resting. BM finally calls about meeting but still doesn’t give final details. I know it’s not really my place, but I told him he should really stay home and rest his foot and that SD can wear her glasses until we see her on Tuesday. There were more conversations with BM and SD and after he said she could wait until Tuesday, BM said she’d drive to our house tonight to get them. We still didn’t know when she was coming tonight and DH was about to put our toddler to bed and then go to bed himself. I usually stay up a little later to either do work or have some “me” time. DH really didn’t want to talk to BM but I told him that if I was going to be giving the contacts to her when she gets to our house, I need to know what time. It was 8:15 and she hadn’t left yet! She finally made it a little before 9pm and I didnt say much to her.
Am I unreasonable to suggest to DH that he should stay home and rest his foot and that SD can just wear glasses for the next day and a half? She’s almost 13 and if she’s going to wear contacts, she needs to be responsible enough to know when she’s running low or is out at BM’s house. And not have her parents go out of their way just because she doesn’t like to wear her glasses
I really want to disengage but I’m finding it hard to. And DH understands, but it’s just difficult.