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Not Attracted to DH Sometimes

morrginme's picture

I get disappointed when I have expectations that aren't met. It doesn't matter to me about looks. While looks can help, attractiveness is based on so much more than that. I expected DH to be a strong minded, firm but caring father. I expected him to be fair to the best of his ability in his dealing with the kids. These are the things I find attractive.

When I keep seeing and/or hearing DH getting obviously manipulated by SD15. I lose respect for him. I wonder if he lacks intelligence to see how silly he lets her make him look. Then I get upset at myself for even thinking something like that.

I get embarrassed for him when she tells him off, put him in what she thinks should be his place, barks orders at him, and makes demands. I get infuriated at him when he expects the rest of us to go along with her crazy demands and entitled attitude to help him keep her happy. He isn't this way with any of the other kids or our mutual child, just her.

Later that night when he turns to me I'm just not turned on or into it. I don't want to get intimate with a door mat. I feel guilty feeling this way but I can't seem to help my feeling about it.



StepUltimate's picture

Unattractive watching a big, strong man get manipulated by skid. I have a hard time coming back from that.

Areyou's picture

Makes sense to me. I cut down sex with DH to one night a week only because I want sex at least once a week. Then I send him home.

elkclan's picture

Ugh - accidentally hit the back button and lost it all. But my sexless marriage had devastating consequences on my psyche and eventually I found someone else to meet those needs and eventually the marriage failed (my ex never found out). As a consequence I never refuse sex with my SO unless I have a darn good reason to. I would never treat sex with my partner the way my ex did. 

morrginme's picture

I hate it when I write something and then somehow lose it. Usually when I rewrite it I don't say nearly as much as the first time. If this is the case with you I would be interested to know what you had written before.