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Skids' decisions...

Last-Wife's picture

Loca Grande cried wolf one too many times... As much as Loghead and I tried to appeal to them, none of them wanted to see their mother today before going in for her "surgery."

She keeps calling it a surgery, but I am now guessing it's just the biopsy for the growth on her thyroid. I'm not really sure. Heck, when I talked to her husband last night, he didn't even seem sure as to what was going on! Sadly, that makes me question what's really going on with her. Is this just another of a MILLION ploys this woman has made to get attention from her kids.

None of 'em want to go- they didn't even want to talk to her. PITA has 3 friends over, so I probably can't appeal to him. Princess left early to go fishing with her boyfriend. (Not buying that, but whatever...) Lazy Boye just left with Loghead to go do a task before the sun comes up and it hits the 100 degree mark... He was gonna work on Lazy Boye and at least get him to call. If he could get him to turn around, he was planning to take Lazy Boye to her city...

I'm so confused. My mind is split on this, and Loghead feels the same way.

On one hand- this is the 5th time in 12 years she told us "it might be cancer." She really dragged the kids through it last January- less then 7 months ago- when she had a lump in her breast. It turned out to be nothing. The kids were emotional wrecks. They missed school for 2 days, and I even took a day of work to go sit with them at the hospital. Now, she keeps telling them not to worry, it's no big deal, you don't have to come, but then she calls me and leaves me nasty messages about how I should make them come. It's like she's testing them, and that's a sick little game. Why put your kids through that?

On the other hand- what if we find out it is cancer? None of the skids deal with emotional stress in good ways, mainly because of the way she has yanked them around for so many years. I'm so afraid they will be wracked with guilt if they weren't there with her today- kinda like, "I can't believe I didn't trust my own mother" kinda thing...

But we laid it out to each of the skids, and none of them wanted to be with her. Honestly, that's really bugging me. She may be crazy, but she is their mother. I can't help but think we should force them to go. I know if the shoe was on the other foot, and it was Loghead in medical trouble, that she would force the skids to see their father...

But that part seems behind us, as the sun begins to rise. So now what?

I don't want to kick her when she's down, but she deserves the right to know WHY her own kids didn't want to come see her. Loghead and I are still trying to figure out how to handle that end of the issue...

God, that's gotta feel like shit to think your own kids don't want to be with you when you're going through something so scary. At the same time, what good mother puts her kids through that! When I had a breast biopsy two years ago, my husband and I didn't tell anyone! We didn't want anyone to worry needlessly in case it was nothing- which it was. To this day, now only my husband and ST knows I went through that scary ordeal... I didn't want my skids to worry...

Comments

PrincessFiona's picture

I haven't read all your back posts but if this is truely about the thyroid even if it's cancer it's one of the most treatable types. I've been through the thyroid biopsy scare and then had mine removed. I don't think there is any reason to concern children until there is a 'real' reason.

Don't feel guilty for not being able to make them care about it. You can only try.

Rags's picture

I am going to do a flip flop on my usual "Screw it and tell the idiots the truth" philosphy.

IMHO it is not your problem to tell BM why her kids are not engaging on her latest "illness". She asked the kids to come, she enlisted you to be her messenger, and the kids were not willing to join her normal crap.

She should have asked them directly instead of sucking you in to her hypocondria crap.

I would not engage with BM at all on this at this point. If it turns out that she actually has a medical condition that is seriose then sit the kids down and tell them to go see their mother and that SHE has something to speak to them about.

For sure I would not join her hypocondriac drama if I were you.

Just my thoughts of course.

Best regards.