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Fussy stepkid

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We have an upcoming event approx 2 hours away that we have been invited to-an engagement dinner for a relative at a restaurant. Young ss (kindergarten) I believe has emotional issues and possibly at some point may be found to have an inherited form of mental illness from his mother, he is extremely fussy, cries at the drop of a hat, and can be just very touchy and unpleasant. It is not practical to think we are going to be able to have him drive to a restaurant, eat, then drive back without meltdowns. That is a bit of a trip for anyone that age but especially a kid like him.

What would you have said?

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BS/SS ( both under 6) and me and hubby are riding in the car, somehow the subject of speeding comes up.

SS: Speed and we can get home fast
BS: We can't speed because you'll go to jail!
SS: My mommy speeds all the time and she doesn't go to jail.
BS Well you can't speed because you'll run in to things.
SS My Mommy speeds and she doesn't run in to things. My Mommy curses when she drives too because she wants to get home and people aren't driving fast enough.

Helping skids transition-any good ideas?

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So I was wondering if any of you have any special ways you help the skids transition for eow visitation? I did not come from a blended family and can only imagine it is really hard to pick up and assimilate into a ncp's household a couple times a month with a whole new set of rules, expectations, and environment. Anything that helped any of you as skids when you were young or that you do for your own?

Unseasonable Clothing

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I really feel bad for my skids sometimes. Their Mom sends them for visitation in the cold and snow without winter coats, hats, mittens or boots. In the summer they will come in long sleeves and long pants. Their comfort just doesn't seem to be a priority. We have full sets of clothing for them here but I just can't imagine as a Mom sending my kids out without appropriate clothing. Last year my schild didn't even have snow pants at her house and had to sit and watch the other kids play in the snow during recess who had proper winter gear while she was on the sidelines.