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Not a big deal but still annoying...also some updates...Warning! Very long

Blueburger's picture

Hi everyone, haven't posted much in a while. Just been busy being a SAHM/SM.
So far everything is going ok with DH and I, and with SD7 as well, the majority of the time that I get pissed off is because of BS4 and retarded XH...BUT that's a story for another time...unless I include it........nah it's ok, another time.
Anywho, if anyone remembers, SD was PASed by MIL actually and was "raised" by MIL instead of DH because she always pointed out how inadequate of a father he was to his face so DH took a step back so MIL wouldnt talk so much crap to both him and SD, plus she had control over everything. (didn't stop her from acting a fool and saying shit anyway though, she's very good at it)
SO...almost a year of both of them outta under MIL's reign, DH has been doing very well backing me up when I need help with either my BS or with SD (THANK GOD!!!). He's gotten a lot better in disciplining SD as well as my BS (he wouldn't know what to do with BS because BS always seeked me out and would run away from him and DH wouldn't enforce any kind of punishment..I don't give in to BS I'm actually rather hard on him but I've told DH that he HAS to discipline him especially when I'm not around but may do so when I'm around as well; BS has to listen to both of us equally, I think anyway).

Ok, so, since DH works 2 mornings and 2 nights per week (has Wednesdays off) I help him by taking SD to school when he works mornings since he starts earlier than when SD has to be at school. On those mornings I wake SD up, do SD's lunch, do SD's hair...pretty much do everything a mom is supposed to do, except I won't ever be able to use the title (because that's either BM whenever she decides to see her kid, or MIL, pretty much ALL the time).
Most of the time when I do her hair, I always pull her bangs back and hold them down with 2 clips because her hair is VERY stubborn (kinda like the owner lol) and I do it because 1. Her bangs are starting to get into her eyes and 2. I think she looks super cute when you can see her entire face. Granted, like DH says, she looks good no matter what, I feel like she loses a bit of her real self under those bangs (she's had them FOREVER!!! Can anyone guess why she's had them FOREVER? Anyone? If you guessed because MIL kows best, BINGO!).
So (unfortunately) MIL helps out at SD's school at lunch once a week...guess who takes SD to school on that day...? Yeah of course it has to be me. So far SD has come back from school without the 2 clips (sometimes several others I put on her to keep her baby hair from escaping lol) 3 times now. She used to just send them back with SD but now she's just keeping them?? Wtf? irritating AND stupid. Thought she had gotten past her controlling crap a while ago. Guess not.
My parents tell me to just ignore her and be the bigger person (aren't grown ups supposed to actually ACT like grown ups?????)...I LITERALLY do ignore her though whenever I'm around her. She just wants attention, I giver as little as I can without being outright rude...I ignore SD too since whenever she's around MIL because she has to act like a complete spoiled brat, crybaby, tattletale. She's none of those things at our house (maybe just a bit of a tattletale but I think that may be normal between both her and BS) Every once in a while SD tries to manipulate DH when I've turned her down for something, I don't play around and call her out on her bull and DH sees it a lot clearer now. He doesn't come to her rescue anymore like he used to. Like I said he backs me up.
Oh yeah I forgot to let you all know that BM (who hasn't seen SD in a year now, hasn't even spoken to her on the phone or anything!) called DH like 3 times to ask him about something non-related to SD (and didn't even ask about SD) and then called the Monday before Xmas to ask DH when he could pick up the presents BM got for her. That was it. Oh no wait! I lied...she DID say something like "we should do visitation sometime soon...I'll let you know when"...and never called asking if SD liked the presents or about visitation.
Then BM calls about 2 weeks ago letting DH know that she's leaving the state for a while and would like to see SD for the last time.......ok....? As far as I know, crazy bipolar BM, since you STILL haven't finished your probation, or whatever, in Illinois, I doubt that you'll be able to leave....
Plus, she pulls this crap all the time. At least 3-4 times a year, sometimes more, she'll say she's leaving the state to go somewhere else (always a different state that we've heard or we've seen her put on fb lol)
PLUS she told DH when she would be leaving but not when she wanted to see what? She's psycho...which is why DH and I call her it fits believe me.
I know it's long, thanks for reading, if anyone did anyway. That's all folks! Unless you guys have questions...


furkidsforme's picture

Here's a humorous idea about the barrettes, but it is petty.

You could approach the teacher and say you are concerned that SD is getting bullied or picked on, because apparently other kids are stealing her barrettes and hair decorations, as she keeps coming home without them and says she is not losing them. Could teacher keep an eye out?

It's petty, I know. Probably better to just let crazy sleeping MIL-dogs lie.

Blueburger's picture

Turns out DH told SD to not let MIL take them off next time and if she asks why she's to tell her that DH said not to...we'll see how that goes since MIL makes her own rules and doesn't respect anything DH says or wants with SD...

Blueburger's picture

She's kind of a favorite there and very well known because even DH's other brothers went to that school and she's always volunteered and has always been very involved with that school. And since SD is her granddaughter (or daughter as MIL likes to pretend that she is the only parent SD has) she HAS to be involved in everything...she thinks it's her right seriously lol.
The 2 things that piss me off about it are that I'm obviously running out of clips and also that she's messing with a hairstyle that I've made. I like doing SD's hair but sometimes it is a struggle trying to get it right, and for her to do that, well it kinda sucks. And I know SD doesn't like that MIL does that because she usually likes the way I fix her hair. Oh well...we'll see if she continues to do this.