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Kid lies about everything

tankh21's picture

This kid lies about everything. I know kids lie but almost everything that comes out of this kid's mouth is a lie. He will lie about the most stupidest things. If BM is a pathological liar could SS have picked up this from a learned behavior?

Comments

WagiMorri's picture

It seems like a heck of a lot of kids go through a stupid lying phase, chances are the circumstances and influences around your skid are making it worse, for sure. Useless lies are mostly about attention.

Veritas's picture

Yes, this can be learned. Embellishment to control their environment so even the stupid lies have meaning to the person lying, whether it is a lack of self-esteem due to telling the truth feeling as if it is lacking in story merit, the need to have control over the information being discussed or as a control method for manipulation.

Willow2010's picture

SS does this to this day. And he is in his 20s. He just makes up some of the dumbest crap. And neither of his parents ever called him on it when he was little so he is almost as bad now.

secret's picture

Just an aside - kids who have gone through/are going through "traumatic" events might be more prone to lie because they're "creating a fantasy world they can control".

Something I picked up as having gone to therapy as a child of an abusive alcoholic. Apparently can also apply to kids of divorce, if the parents are psychotic enough.

Some grow out of it, some don't.

Ninji's picture

SD has always been a huge liar. I think it started as a way to shield herself from the negativity of high conflict parents. BM doesn't send her to school, lie to dad about it so she doesn't get a lecture. DH sends her with a phone she isn't allowed to have at BM's, lie to mom so she can still talk to dad during the week.

Now she lies about everything, DH asked her if she ate before he took her to BM's a few weeks ago. She immediately lied. She literally just got done eating??? Her first response is always to lie. Asked her if she showered, she lies. Lies lies lies.

notsobad's picture

This is so interesting to me.
SS(26) lies to both his parents about the most mundane stupid things. I've always seen it as a way to protect himself.

Years ago DH had an F150 truck. DH told SS that as soon as he got his license the truck was his.
SS was so excited, he really seemed to want the truck.
BM called and said that's crazy, he doesn't need a big expensive gas guzzling truck. SS told her that he didn't even want it. She then went on to say that DH should sell the truck and buy two smaller cars, one for her and one for SS. Of course she did!
DH straight up asked him, "Do you want this truck?
Yes!
Then why did you tell your mom you didn't want it.
I didn't, she thinks it's to expensive."

Of course DH thinks BM is lying. SS didn't get his license till he was 20, just after I'd had an accident and totalled the truck. Problem solved.

It's continued to this day.
SS will say what he thinks his parents want to hear.
He'll say he's coming to visit but won't show up. He'll say he's excited about a gift but won't ever wear it. Which is polite but seriously dude, I asked your size and if you like the store!?!
We've learned to never really count on anything he says when it comes to visits or what gifts to give him or his opinions on certain things.
He will lie in an effort to avoid conflict.

jollybean's picture

Yes he has decided to copy her poor behaviour and furthermore will not be scared of any consequence.

jollybean's picture

Why are you concerned? Because experience teaches you that telling a lie involves covering a lie and that eventually when the truth comes out the consequences are far worse then you imagined. He hasn't got there yet because he doesn't imagine there is any punishment that he would be scared of and there isn't anything in his life he has to lose.

mommadukes2015's picture

YUP. My SS can't answer a straight forward question because he stutters and stumbles over himself trying to figure out what will happen if he tells the truth. That's after YEARS of BM and her freaking crap.

Lying gets punished very seriously in this house. I will not tolerate it.

strugglingSM's picture

Do we have the same SS?! What bothers me more is that BM is always telling DH how “sincere” SS is when she wants to yell at DH over something untrue that SS said DH did.

This kid has been caught in terrible lies at school (with videos that prove he’s lying), yet BM still thinks he’s honest Abe whenever it comes to something that has to do with DH.